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The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!
THE CRITIQUE CIRCLE

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CRITIQUE CIRCLE

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CRITIQUE GUIDELINES

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It's easy to critique the works of others and get your work critiqued. Just follow the steps below:

1) Post your first piece.

2) You must then critique the work of another member to post another piece yourself.

3) For each critique you give, you earn 1 credit that can be used to post another one of your writings.

4) You can build up credits to be used at another time by giving critiques to others.
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TITLE: Loosing Baggage
By Amanda Morris
07/18/06
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This was actually my creative writing exam my senior year of high school. Mrs. Dunker gave us three pages of random words and phrases. I wove the ones that jumped out at me into this poem (one of my favorites). It's supposed to be aligned in the center of the page, and the "Daddy" I am speaking to in the poem is refering to God.
Daddy,
I'm dreaming pictures from you,
Tracing patterns in the painting,
Touching you on my paper-
Frost-bitten socks flapping on the line
In sierra winds,
The place where the wind calls your name,
Salty air and rain dripping
Among the invisible trees,
I remember Daddy-
Unraveling the constellations with you,
Then watching them fall
One by one back into the moon.

I remember your song
Under the trees, the river laughing with you,
Lemon sun and cotton moon.
Sometimes I feel my lips
Are talking to the air when I
Talk to you.

Getting lost was easy, Daddy
Unsure eyes taking chances
On green carpet and copper wire.
Wanting your fire,
I find blues and more blues,
A substitute for a dream
I cannot stop feeling-
An infinite scratch upon the surface,
My beginnings of finding you.

Leave the night light on for me Daddy,
I'm reaching the under growth
Forty feet down in backwards
River currents,
Throwing it all away
To come back to you.

5/23/02
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