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HUMOR


TITLE: Your Questions, My Answers
By beth soledad
09/26/09
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(opening theme music)

radio host: "Good afternoon and welcome to 'Your Questions… My Answers'! Today we have a caller from San Fransico! Hello! How are you this afternoon?"

caller: "Fine, thank you. I'm so excited to be on your show."

"Thanks. Great to have you. Now, you're name is Lexi, right?"

"That's right."

"Ok, Lexi, what's your question?"

"Well, I was wondering… How can I know what friends are going to stick around? Like, I'm always getting super excited about these friends I met but then I like never see them again! Or they forget about me."

"You know what, Lexi? I think I have the perfect answer for your question."

~drum roll in the background~

"It's a formula I use called 'Friends and Food' or maybe 'Yummy friends' or if you rather you can call it 'Food Friends'. Whatever you feel comfortable with. Are you still with me?"

"Yeah, I'm still here."

"Let me explain."

"Please do!"

"I like to "divide" my friends into different categories. If you're taking notes, there are four different categories.

#1. Fast-food friends.

These are the people that you met like once in your life, maybe at church, at a birthday party, or at the mall. You talk, hit it off, exchange e-mails addresses and never see that person again. Fast-food friends are a vital part of our life because they teach us to be open to others and see their needs. Fast-food friends often fill a part of our heart where we needed a quick smile or encouraging word… but it doesn't last long. My advice is to accept the Fast-food friends God sends your way, but don't become depressed when the friendship doesn't last or when life moves you on.

#2. Sit-down friends. (like, you know… Denny's. A sit-down restaurant.)

These are the friends that you met maybe at conference, camp, while on a cruise, or on missions trip. You spend, let's say, a week together and realize that you're a lot alike. Our instinct is to become bffs and vow to move to the same city, get married on the same day, and even get buried by each other. (guys, not sure you think about the whole marriage thing… but girls do!)

But before you become kindred spirits, realize that God allowed you to meet them for a reason… but that He also wants you back in "your life". (By that I mean, your home and church) I don't know about you, but I immediately think , "If I know that I won't see them a week from now, then it's not worth it! It's not worth sharing my dreams or fears when two years from now we might not even remember each other!"
When these thoughts come to mind, I remember two things my mom always says. First, will your life be better for knowing them? and second, it's better to love and lose than to not love at all. Will their friendship help you grow spiritually? Then don't hold back your friendship! Do they need your friendship and trust? Then share your struggles with them and by sharing your life you just might be able to help them overcome their struggles and fears.

#3. Buffet friends.

These friends are VERY easy to recognize. The most obvious buffet-friends live with us, use the same sink to brush their teeth, and always turn their socks inside-out! (very gross!) Anyway, your family and really close friends make up this group of special people. This is the group of friends that you can trust without hesitating. This is the group of friends that you can share everything with and know that they would never make fun of you. This group will give you advice and be honest about your faults. All in all… this is the most important group of friends. "No success in life can compensate for failure at home."
Did you know that the Bible doesn’t tell us to 'be independent' , 'spread our wings', or 'live our own life'? Rather, the Bible commands us to obey our parents and to honor them until they die. Plus, your parents and siblings will be there forever. They'll be there when you wake up every morning, when you come home from college, and when you get married. Invest in those that matter the most in your life!

#4. Picnic Person.

I can't really speak with authority on this category of friendship. Notice the word 'Person'? It's singular. Yep, this is the 'one and only'. This person you will love more than any other friend in your life. This is the person that you grow old with and the person that will know you better than anyone in the world. I don't know about you, but this special person isn't in my life yet. But that doesn’t mean that I don't have a responsibility to my 'Picnic Person'. My responsibility to this special person is to grow in the Lord and prepare for whatever He wants me to do. My responsibility is to be true and pure. One of my favorite songs is "Yours Forever" by Ron Hamilton. One part of the song says, "I promise you, I will be true. Faithful in all things, loyal to you." Even now, you can prepare to be the best friend of your Picnic Person by loving the Lord and being faithful.

Lexi? Lexi? You still there?"

(pencil scratching)

"Yeah, I'm here. (panting) Number four… was that the 'Peanut Person'?"

(laughing)

"No, no. It was the 'Picnic Person'."

"Gotcha."

(closing theme music)

"Well, folks, it's time to close. Thanks so much for tuning in to 'Your Questions… My Answers' Please send any questions to… me! Hope this helps you some. Bye!"

(last notes fade away...)

"Hello?

Um… I'm still on the line! Hello?! How do you spell 'picnic'???"

-beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep-
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