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The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!
THE CRITIQUE CIRCLE

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2) You must then critique the work of another member to post another piece yourself.

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4) You can build up credits to be used at another time by giving critiques to others.
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POETRY


TITLE: Unalike Twins
By Sheldon Bass
02/06/14
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This is my first attempt at a villanelle. It was for the challenge but failed to go through. I really need some feed back on this to see if I did it correctly, and if it has any appeal, or merit, or if it should be used as an example of horrendously terrible poetry. :)
Never shall one be again, or ever the same
Changing tides of time waltz on to alter
Binding cords to the past, a futile game

Deepening lines in faces swiftly came
Matching bookend of myself, a halter
Never shall one be again, or ever the same

Circling back to youth is a foolish flame
Thereís mellower notes upon my psalter
Binding cords to the past, a futile game

Wooly wild lads will all someday be tame
From their fields of folly where they falter
Never shall one be again, or ever the same

Wise men reach forward to a better name
At the pitfalls they become a vaulter
Binding cords to the past, a futile game

Young and old versions never twins became
A fool in timeóno more the defaulter
Never shall one be again, or ever the same
Binding cords to the past, a futile game
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