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The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!
THE CRITIQUE CIRCLE

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1) Post your first piece.

2) You must then critique the work of another member to post another piece yourself.

3) For each critique you give, you earn 1 credit that can be used to post another one of your writings.

4) You can build up credits to be used at another time by giving critiques to others.
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POETRY


TITLE: My Life as a Slave
By Mike Shoemake
04/22/12
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No notes to share for this one. Thanks for reading! Be brutally honest. :)
I am always afraid,
Always looking over my shoulder.
My master hates me.
Tormenting me at his whim.
I sometimes wonder
Who he will hurt next.
I hope it's not me.
I'm so sick of it being me.
I try to escape, try to hide.
He always knows how to find me.

I dream of Freedom.
Freedom is elusive.
Or perhaps illusion.
At every turn it evades.

I have no hope.

My master imprisons me.
He steals from me at every turn.
He would have me destitute,
Alone, shackled to a nightmare.
He robs me of life. He leaves me with regret.
My master is Sin, and my master hates me.
I hate Him, almost as much as I hate myself.

But payment has been made.
Another master beckons me.
I am free to follow,
Free to obey, free to be his slave.
Free to leave one master
And be shackled by another...
True freedom: pure illusion.
There is no escape.
I will always have a master.
The tears come once again...

He has paid for me now and I hear him
Simply ask gently that I follow Him home.
I am bought and purchased, yet still He asks!
He says he will lead me.
Direct me, guide me. Help me, find me.
Protect me, restore me.
Save me.

Love me! Like a child-- Adopted into his family
And treated like I deserve to be there!
An impossible kindness For an unlikely beneficiary.

Freedom is illusion.
But love? Perhaps that is real.
I hope it is real. I want it to be real.
I just know that I am willing to chance it.
And so I humbly agree to
A transfer of ownership.
When he calls, I will follow.
When he asks, I will obey.
I will belong to him.
He will be both my master and my father,
And I will be both his son
And his slave.
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REMEMBER, this is a Critique Circle. Please try to give a critique to receive a critique. If you do not want to give any critiques, you can use the REGULAR ARTICLE SUBMISSION area. If you are unsure about how to critique, please use the CRITIQUE GUIDELINES and CRITIQUE TIPS.

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To view your critiques that you receive on any writing, login to your account and click "CRITIQUE CIRCLE MANAGEMENT" to view all of your critiques and edit each piece. Then, click "VIEW CRITIQUES" next to the article title to view critiques on that piece. Comments on all of your writings when using the Critique Circle will not be displayed publicly as regular and writing challenge articles. They can only be viewed by accessing them from your account.