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Deciphering Christianese
by Leah Nichols 
09/24/08
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Mini-Challenge Week 1 of September Break (2008)
Jan's Master Class
Avoiding Cliche Like the Plague
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Christianese:

Brothers and sisters, in the light of eternity, these momentary trials and tribulations will simply fade away under the Blood. In the flesh we may fall to the enemy's schemes, but if we walk with God and keep our eyes on the prize, even though we walk through the fire we will have the victory as we surrender all. We are His sheep, and He will see us through. So turn the other cheek, put on your armor, and run the race to win. Boldly face the battle, for you are bought with a price. Do not be double minded, but stay on the straight and narrow. The last will be first, so remember to wait upon Him to set you free. Cry out: Abba Father, revive me again! More of You, and less of me. In the secret place on our knees we can cry for deliverance, and we will receive showers of blessings in His time. Glory!

Translation:

Listen up, all you Christians! When you consider the incredible life we will have in heaven forever, the hard times we have to go through in this life on earth mean absolutely nothing compared to what Christ has already suffered for us when He died. If we try to live a good life by our own will alone, the devil can trick us easily because he is smarter than us. If, however, we listen for God's voice to lead us and keep our minds focused on the final goal of our reward in heaven, even though we suffer, we still win in the end as we give up our control to God. God will take care of us, and just like a shepherd that takes care of his sheep, He sees things that we cannot see. So do not respond in anger when you are treated cruelly as a Christian. Prepare yourself to face the spiritual battle in the world by knowing what the Bible says and really believing it. Stay focused as you live your life as a Christian, aiming to be the best you can be. Stand up for truth and against injustice, because God forgave you of your sins and He died so you could live - He deserves honor for what He did, so live like He would. Have integrity to live the same way no matter who is around you, and live righteously even when it seems much easier to sin. If we give up sin and our own way in this life, God will give us great honor in heaven, so pray earnestly and ask Him to help you live righteously. Pray like this: Daddy, help me live with the same joy I had when I first met You! Be more important than anything else in my life, including myself. As we humbly pray these kinds of prayers that no one else sees, we can ask for God's help in every difficult circumstance of our lives and He will fully bless us at the perfect time and place. Praise God!

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Addition, as specified by class homework:

1. As quiet as a mother checking on her sleeping child

2. As cute as a kitten

3. As black as ebony

4. As dumb as a cow

5. As strong as a bridge suspension cable

6. As ugly as a rumor

7. As pretty as a flower

8. As poor as a small town preacher

9. As neat as a library

10. As thin as a spiderweb

If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be! TRUST JESUS NOW

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Member Comments
Member Date
Judy Wilson 24 Sep 2008
Well done! keep writing for His glory !
Valarie Sullivan 24 Sep 2008
This was good! So often, we speak 'christianese' like you say, when plain speech is what is needed! Thank you!




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