Hire
Writers
Editors
Home Tour About Read What's New Help Forums Join
My Account Login
Shop
Save
Support
E
Book
Store
Learn
About
Jesus
  



The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!



 
Encouragement PLEASE ENCOURAGE THE AUTHOR BY COMMENTING

  LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE   SEND A PRIVATE MESSAGE
  HIRE THIS WRITER
REPORT ARTICLE

 TRACK THIS AUTHOR ADD TO MY FAVORITES
corner
What's New
 
corner
 
This too shall pass
by Julie Michaelson
09/01/08
For Sale
Author requests article critique


  Mail
 





For everything
there is
a season,
and a time
for every matter
under Heaven.
[Ecclesiastes 3:1]
************************
"LORD?
Can You ........
unplug my TOILET?"

[PATIENT SIGH.]

"HUH?"

[PATIENT SILENCE.]

"I was gonna ask You
to send angel MICHAEL
down to HELP!"

[PATIENT FROWN.]

"But......I've asked Ya
that, BEFORE........"

[PATIENT NOD.]

"Yeah!
(Kvetchy look.)
And.....Ya WOULDN'T!"

"No, Mein kinder."

"Uh, UH!"

[PATIENT NOD.]

"Even though,
he's a JEWISH
archangel?
(Smile up at floor lamp shade.)
And.....I'm one a'
his KINDRED?"

[PATIENTLY SHAKE HEAD.]
[WISE LOOK.]
"Uh uh."

(Smile!)
"Hey.......LORD?"

"What, Mein kinder."

"Is that TRUE?"

"What."

"That SAYING?"

[PATIENT SILENCE.]

"Ya know: that.....
this TOO shall
PASS?"

[NOD.]

"Did YOU say
that, LORD?"

"Look,
child."

'WHERE?"

[PATIENT GAZE.]
"Read My Word,
My precious."

(Impatient frown.)
"Eh.......I'm too lazy.
(Squirm.)
Can't Ya just
TELL me?"

"No.
[GENTLE FROWN.]
Read My Word."

(Mumble.)
"Yeah......
(Murmur.)
I'll look it up online."

[PATIENT SIGH.]

"Hey......LORD?
I made a LIST here
of things that will
always........PASS!
(Smile up at ceiling.)
Are Ya LISTENING?"

[PATIENT NOD.]
"Go on."
[SIGH.]

"Okay.
(Thoughtful squint.)
(Sip of Walmart orange drink.)
(Very intellectual squint.)
(Pet scruffy, impurely bred cat.)
(Take another sip of sugary orange drink.)
Here goes:

PLUGGED UP TOILETS!
SADNESS!
LONELINESS!
GRIEF!
DISEASE!
PAIN!
NAUSEA!
BROKEN BONES!
SPRAINED ANKLES!
SURGERY!
SENSUAL PLEASURE!
HEARTBURN!
ACID REFLUX!
NATIONAL ELECTIONS!
GASY STOMACH!
CRYING!
TEARS!
AGGRAVATION!
DIVORCE!
DESPAIR!
HURRICANES!
EARTHQUAKES!
WAR!
DEATH!
and the worst........
CONSTIPATION!"

[WISE ALL KNOWING NOD.]
"Yes, My child."

"YEAH!"

[PAUSE.]
"But for One Thing,
My child."

"YEAH?
(Yell up at air conditioning vent.)
What's THAT?
TAXES?"

[PATIENT LOOK.]
"No, My child."

"Eh........
(Squint.)
dirty.... LITTER BOXES?"

[PATIENT GAZE OF A LOVING FATHER.]

(Sassy smile.)
(Squint.)
(Squirm.)
"Eh...............
eh.......
Your JUDGMENT?"

[NOD.]

(More squirming.)
"Uh oh."

[LONG PAUSE.]

"Uh oh."

[NOD.]
"Good, child.
Now, read
My Word."
*********************
The first angel
blew his trumpet,
and there followed
hail and
fire,
mixed with blood,
which fell
on the earth;
and a third
of the earth
was burnt up.
[Revelation 8:7]

___________________________
(Author's note:
According to Wikipedia,
this saying originated
in the Hebrew language,
with King Solomon.
[Hey, I said I was lazy.]
Actually, I think that
Adam was the first one
to say it. Yeah; he
said it, as he looked
back at the angels,
standing in front of
the Garden Gates holding
the flame torches aloft.
He said:
"Don't worry about it,
Eve! This'll....PASS!")











If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be! TRUST JESUS NOW

Read more articles by Julie Michaelson or search for articles on the same topic or others.


Read More - Free Reprints, Main Site Articles, Most Read Articles or highly acclaimed Challenge Articles. Read Great New Release Christian Books for FREE in our Free Reads for Reviews Program. Christian writers can JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and help spread the Gospel.


The opinions expressed by authors do not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.

Hire a Christian Writer, Christian Writer Wanted, Christian Writer Needed, Christian Content Needed
Find a Christian Editor, Hire a Christian Editor, Christian Editor, Find a Christian Writer
 
corner
Corner
This article has been read 320 times     < Previous | Next >


Member Comments
Member Date
Joanne Sher  01 Sep 2008
VERY clever and excellent point. Enjoyed this.




TRUST JESUS TODAY











Free Audio Bible
500 Plus Languages
Faith Comes By Hearing.com