this is no life
I have asked God to help me. I asked: help me reclaim myself. I want to feel happy with my life again. I asked for help.
I asked for strength. I asked that I be given help with my troubled mind.
This is not entirely true. What I did was thank god for helping me resist my mind’s penchant" its inertia toward disapproval, self-hatred, self-doubt, self-pity and self-loathing. I don't want my habitual self disapprobation. It has hurt me.
I thanked god for allowing my mind to quiet. I thanked god for helping me to allow myself to accept my life; to live again.
I need to reclaim my life.
Reclaim it from the doldrums of guilt. To reclaim it from this downward spiral. I want to live again. Fully. To smile with equanimity. In peace.
I need to live again.
Or just die.
Because this is no life.
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This is sad, but well written. Short, concise and true. The reason for my 'Seasons of the heart' poem. Thank you for your kind comment. God is faithful, and good. Keep on, keeping on for Him. God Bless. Elizabeth.