Devotionals
Some people are just plain hard to communicate with. Have you ever been in conversations with people who turn everything around to their point of view? How about people who do nothing but complain or attack but are never willing to admit that they are at least part of the problem? Do you know one of these people? Chances are, yes. Chances are, you also ARE one of these people. (I am too, don't worry, you are in good company!)
I have been thinking a lot about communication lately, and how our human ways of communicating are SO far away from GOD'S ideals of communicating. I have also been thinking about ways to correct my own bad communication habits….
So, as I was reading today, I came upon an interesting idea in this area. I was reading a story I have read so many times before, found in John 10:22-42. Jesus goes to Jerusalem for the Feast of Dedications, in the winter, (why that is important I have no idea, maybe I will do some research on that later!) At any rate, He went to Jerusalem for one of the feasts, and, of course, wanted to go to the Temple.
Even in the midst of all the controversy surrounding Him, knowing the Jews were out to get Him, He still ENTERED the temple.
He didn't even get into the Temple, but only made it to the outer part, Solomon's Porch, before he was accosted and surrounded by the Jews before He could even utter a word. "Tell us plainly, are you the Christ??" (As if they would have had a right to order Him to do anything!) They even accused HIM of making them DOUBT! (Jesus came to promote FAITH, not DOUBT, remember…)
What I don't understand in my humanity is that Jesus actually ENTERTAINED their question! He didn't have to answer that! He was GOD! He is not subject to the whims and questions of men! Yet, He answered them. (Not plainly, as they asked, but He in no uncertain terms told them that He was One with the Father, and that His works bore witness of His divinity.)
They stood up with stones to stone Him (Did they have them at the ready just in case He fell for their little trap?) Jesus ENGAGED them in conversation, "For which of My good works are you stoning Me?" He didn't get angry, and He had every right to. He didn't tell them off, and He could have done away with them with even one word. He didn't respond with physical violence, although it would have been justified. He simply asked a question. Why? (Reminds me of God in the Garden of Eden, "Where are you, Adam and Eve?" or God speaking to Cain, "Where is your brother Abel?")
God uses rhetorical questions sometimes, just as parents do, to get His point across. (Are you allowed to jump on the bed? Why do you think that you can have a Hershey bar for breakfast? Have you folded your clothes yet?) These are obviously questions where the answer is not required, but designed to make people think. Have you ever noticed that when you think you have come up with a solution "on your own" to something (even if you were given leading questions to get there!) that you still feel like you thought of it yourself and you will remember it longer? I do!
My counselor asks me lots of questions, and makes me think through the answers, even though she could just tell me what is right. It wouldn't be my solution and my thought process though, it would be hers, and I wouldn't learn anything from it. Jesus, in this case, is engaging their minds, making them sit back and think about what they are about to do.
They, predictably, missed the point, and called Him a blasphemer, and He answered them again on their level. (How patient He is!) They apparently didn't like His response, because in verse 39, they try to capture Him again. No answer is good enough to change their minds; their minds were made up before the conversation even started.
So, Jesus ESCAPED. He got away. He saw that having the discussion was NOT working, and left. He was not going to stay there anymore and give them any more credence to what they were saying than He already had. He tried to win them, but when they kept trying to kill Him, and He knew that it wasn't yet His time, He left. Conversation ended. Nothing more to say.
Next time we see Him (v. 40-42), He is EVANGELIZING. He is in the area where John the Baptist had made his home, and apparently many of John's disciples were still in that area. The Bible does not give specifics, but Jesus must have engaged these people in conversation also, because it says that many believed in Him there. How can they believe in someone and know that what John says about Him is true, if they did not talk to Him themselves?? What better communication is there, than to tell others about how to get to Heaven? MANY believed in Him there….
So, if the Bible is applicable to life today, let's get back to those people who are hard to communicate with from the first paragraph.
There were two groups of people that Jesus communicated with in this passage. There were those who were going to reject Him, and those who were going to accept Him. Once they showed their hearts by their words and actions, and He knew that sticking around to argue with them was not going to make any difference in their attitude or action. He left. He did not waste any more time on them, but instead went to another group of people who would accept Him and listen to Him.
Just like Jesus, we can ENTER places where people are just waiting to attack us. (We don't have to avoid family or other gatherings because people know we are Christians and are waiting to trip us up!)
We can ENTERTAIN their questions and accusations; listen to them, attempt to answer them. Most of us do not have a problem getting this far. But the next step is where most people, including myself, get derailed. I need to learn how to ENGAGE people in questions, challenge them about their assumptions, in a kind way, of course. And, I need to learn to realize WHEN TO STOP.
A dear older Christian friend is constantly heard quoting the words from an old, "Country and Western" song. Although secular in nature it does display a bit of practical wisdom. It is advice given by an old gambler to a younger man new at the trade. "You've got to know when to hold them, know when to fold them, know when to walk away, know when to run."
Some people do not care about anything beyond the argument. They either like to argue, or they like to be right. I need to know when it is ok to leave the cards on the table and either walk or run away depending on the circumstances. And, when an opportunity to EVANGELIZE arises, I need to hold those cards and believe that the, "…Word shall not return void," as I share it's truth and power. At the end of this chapter, Jesus talked to people who were ready to hear, ready to listen, and ready to accept His message.
May God grant me (us) the discernment to know who to keep talking to, and who to escape from.
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Beautiful job of communicating your feelings on communication. I'm sure we all need to read, heed, and pray about what you've said in this article. Thank you for sharing what the Lord is teaching you.
Beautiful job of communicating your feelings on communication. I'm sure we all need to read, heed, and pray about what you've said in this article. Thank you for sharing what the Lord is teaching you.
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