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Beware Oh, beware of the sheisters
by Julie Michaelson
02/09/08
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[Author's note: a 'sheister'
is Yiddish for 'con artist'.
'Tsoris' is very bad,
very sad trouble.]
______________________________
When you finish
reading this book,
bind a stone to it
and cast it into
the midst
of the Euphrates...
[Jeremiah 51:63]
***************************
"Lord?"

[SILENCE.]

"LORD?
LORD!"

[SILENCE.]

"I know You're
UP THERE, Lord!"

[SILENCE.]

"Lord, come on!
I've had a LONG day!"

"Tell Me, little one."

"Well, for one thing,
my chunk of I10
was closed off,
again, this morning!
It wasn't FUNNY!"

[SOLEMN NOD.]

"What is this, Lord:
part of my DEDROSSING?"

"Perhaps, My precious."

"Well, that's alright;
I have a lot to
be thankful for.
There's too much
tsoris in our
country, right now."

"Hm."

"Yeah;
if these elections
weren't so frightening,
they'd almost be...
well, eh....
kinda FRIGHTENING!"

[PATIENCE SILENCE.]

"I hope You know what
You're doin, Lord.
Cuz, I don't think
anybody else does."

"I understand, My child."

"So, Lord?
What's with all these
publisher ads on my PAGE?"

[PATIENT NOD.]

"I don't like 'em."

"Why, My precious."

"Eh......they make my
page look low class:
like, it's in a gambling
casino, or somethin.
How do I get RID of
'em?"

"It is the world, My child."

"Ech. You know all
these 'self' publishers
are just a bunch a'
sheisters."

[MORE PATIENT SILENCE.]

"All they want is your
money, 'Ya know?"

"I understand, My child."

"Hey, LORD?
Are Ya keeping
my stuff, in a special
FOLDER, or somethin?"

[SMILE.]

"I HOPE so.
Because, You know,
I keep hearing about
Your Judgment Seat.
The Christians
say that we're all
gonna get judged, according
to our works."

[NOD.]

"WELL?
When I get to the
Judgment Room,
I wanna see all my
stuff out,
on Your Table,
that's WHAT!"

"No, My child."

"HUH?"

"All of your life
will be There."

"Oy vey es mir."

[CHUCKLE.]
************************
And the dead
were judged
by what was written
in the books,
by what they had done.
[Revelation 20:12]



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