Have you not known?
Have you not heard?
The Lord is the Everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends
of the earth.
He does not faint
or grow weary,
His understanding
is unsearchable.
[Isaiah 40:28]
**************************
"Hey, Lord?"
"What is it, My child?"
"Have You ever heard
of the FUJITA SCALE?"
[NOD.]
"I think it's supposed
to measure how big
a tornado is......
(squint)
or, is it a HURRICANE?
I forget.
(more squinting)
Or, maybe it's for
an earthquake.
Anyhow, it's SOMETHING."
[PATIENT NOD.]
"I can't remember;
anyway, that's how
somebody could measure
my Wimp-Factor,
Lord."
"I understand, My beloved."
"You DO?
YOU know what a WIMP
is, Lord?"
[SOLEMN NOD.]
"Well, THAT'S weird.
I don't think that
word was even invented, till,
like....1985, or something.
Weren't You born, like....
in B.C.?"
[LAUGH.]
"I'm a wimp, Lord.
And,
everybody knows it.
All my life:
and,
it's been 51 years."
"Yes, child."
"SEE?
You AGREE, too!"
"Perhaps you are, child.
But, where is your strength?"
"I don't know, Lord.
Maybe, it got lost somewhere.....
......in the ends of the earth.
What was that movie called....
'Journey to the INSIDE of the Earth'?
I can't remember: it was a 1950's movie."
[LAUGH!]
"WELL?
Where IS it?
How come You gave some
to everybody ELSE?
And, NONE to ME?"
[SILENCE.]
"That's not fair, Lord!
You know I was gonna'
NEED some!
You KNEW!
And, You didn't
GIVE me ANY!"
[PATIENT SILENCE.]
"Look, child."
"Where.
I don't see NOTHIN'."
"Look again."
(squint)
(more squinting)
(two pair of glasses slip down nose)
"Don't see nothin', Lord.
Should I take my GLASSES off....
sometimes, I can actually see
BETTER if I......."
"Look, child!"
"WHAT?
What are 'Ya YELLIN'
at me, for?
All I see is A BIG WIMP!"
"Stop looking at yourself, child."
"Yeah, but......."
"And, look.
At Me."
**************************
But they who wait for the Lord
shall renew their strength,
they shall mount up
with wings of eagles,
they shall run
and not be weary,
they shall walk
and not faint.
[Isaiah 40:31]
___________________________________
[Author's note: The Fujita Scale is used
to rate the intensity of a tornado.
Dr. Theodore T. Fujita and Dr. Allen Pearson
invented it in 1971. I guess the other guy
was a wimp; that's why he didn't get his
name on it.]
____________________________________________
[P.S. THAT'S IT! THAT'S IT!
It was called 'Journey to the Center of the Earth'!)
Read more articles by Julie Michaelson or search for articles on the same topic or others.
I love your stories. They always make me laugh and are true to life. Have you ever thought about writing books, or being a reporter? They need people like you. Keep on writing girl.
