I step through the door with dread in my every move. The room is Peaceful and familiar but still I am not at ease. At any other time stepping through this door would be a pleasure, but today….
The teacher did not greet me at the door but soon He comes and offers His welcome. With the greeting complete I am quickly ushered to my judgment, my lesson.
It is not the teacher or the lesson itself that holds menace. No, today, I fear my own inadequacy. I fear because I know I will fall short. Not only will my melody lack perfection, but it will also fall far below the standard I am capable of.
How do I know this? I know because I am the one who did not practice. It was me who was distracted, busy, and undisciplined. I will fail because I failed to give my all.
So today, as I stand before the teacher, I am ashamed. He is soon to discover my shirking. I know that no harsh discipline awaits me but still I dread the moment of reckoning. I dread the moment He realizes that His teaching has been wasted on an unworthy novice.
As the lesson progresses I am surprised that no rebuke is given. I can see the disappointment in His eyes as He listens and corrects; yet still He teaches. My apparent failure has not swayed his devotion. Though I was faithless in practice He is ever faithful in teaching. Though today, my fingers clumsily pound out the tune, He hears how the melody will one day soar. Though I had, for a moment, forgotten my purpose, He will ever be vigilant to His. He never ceases to teach.