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Are You as strong as duct tape, Lord?
by Julie Michaelson
12/28/07
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With God are wisdom
and might;
He has counsel and
understanding.
If He tears down,
none can rebuild.....
If He withholds the waters,
they dry up.......
[Job 12:13-15]
***************************
"Are You, Lord?"

"What, child."

"That strong."

[PATIENT SILENCE.]

"I don't think so, Lord.
I mean, I think You USED
to be, but....."

[PATIENT NOD.]

"Also, I think You used
ta' be a lot stricter."

"When, child."

"Huh? Eh......like,
around the time 'a Moses.
I mean, You didn't let
anybody get away with
NOTHIN'."

"When, child?"

"Eh.....let's see;
like, remember this
time:

Now Nadab and Abihu,
the sons of Aaron,
each took his censer,
and put fire in it,
and laid incense on it,
and offered unholy fire
before the Lord....
And fire came forth
from the presence of
the Lord
and devoured them......
[Leviticus 10:1-2]

and this time, Lord:

And they carried the ark
of God upon a new cart....
Uzzah and Ahio were driving
the cart.
And David and all Israel
were making merry before
God with all their might,
with songs and lyres.....
And when they came to
the threshing floor of Chidon,
Uzzah put out his hand
to hold the ark,
for the oxen stumbled.
And the anger of the Lord
was kindled against Uzzah;
and He smote him.......
[1 Chronicles 13:7-10]

That was pretty strict, Lord."

"Yes, child."

"I don't think that was fair.
It wasn't this Uzo's fault,
that his cow stubbed its hoof."

[PATIENT NOD.]

"Anyhow, do 'Ya see what
I mean?"

[VERY PATIENT NOD.]

"Nowadays, Lord,
people can do just about
ANYTHING. They drop
stuff all the TIME."

"Like you, My precious?"

"Well, yeah.
But, that's different."

"I see, My child."

"And, in the Old Testament,
You did a lot more stuff,
like, create the world,
make people, whales, the
moon, Pluto, kangaroos,
baby seals, the screech owl,
fire ants, Atlantic City..........."

[SMILE.]

"And, You divided that Sea......"

"Which one, child?"

"Eh......I think it was the Red Sea,
Lord. But, that's not my POINT.
You're not getting my POINT!
It just seems to me, Lord, that
You've done less and less,
as time's gone by!"

[PATIENT SMILE.]
"WHOSE time, child?"

"Well......my time, naturally."

"Is your time over, My precious?"

(smile)
"Just about, Lord;
at least, I HOPE so."

[VERY PATIENT SMILE.]

"The thing is, Lord,
You didn't even make DUCT
tape! And, that's the
strongest thing I KNOW!"

[LAUGH.]
"Who did make this tape,
My beloved?"

"Eh, I don't know, Lord:
some guy.....probably in the
1950's. It was probably
in Cleveland.....or Pittsburgh.
I'm just guessing."

[NOD.]
"And, Who made these
things, child?"

"Eh.......the AMERICANS, Lord!
WE invented Pittsburgh!
CLEVELAND, TOO!
So THERE!"

[INFINITELY PATIENT,
AND SMILING NOD.]

(humbled silence)
"Lord?"

"Yes, child?"

"I think duct tape was
Your greatest achievement, Lord.
Well, that and the screech owl.
We've already discussed my
disappointment over Pluto -
'Ya know - not being a real
planet, and all."

"Yes, child.
Go to sleep.
I love you, too."
*******************************
....You shall love the Lord
your God
with all your heart,
and with all your soul,
and with all your might.
[Deuteronomy 6:5]

________________________________

(Author's note: Adhesive tape was
invented by Richard Drew of Minnesota
Manufacturing Company [3M]
in the 1920's. Their Johnson & Johnson
Division recreated it into 'duct tape'
approximately 1942. Originally,
it was called 'duck tape', because
of it being so waterproof.)

















If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be! TRUST JESUS NOW

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