Today I died. Today HE Lives. I have cut the cords of procrastination, which was my lifeís blood flow. Today I lay exposed naked and ashamed in the pool of my self -imposed iniquity.
I sensed something different about today, but just like any other day I silenced the longing and the calling I felt trying to creep out of the depths of my soul.
I got up and dressed myself in my daily swimwear. My mind all geared up for my self-serving ambition. My goggles to ensure my vision were clear to the Sea of Secularism. I stepped out the door and jumped off the diving board and directly summer salted into my world of thoughts. Splashing here and there in of thoughts of self-grandeur.
I thought my landing was perfect. I usually fluttered about and went with any wave I felt would carry on to my nirvana. No matter how short lived the glory was, the quick dip in life's illusions served me well. It helped me exercise my muscles of self-will.
But this day was different. My creative skills and cunning wiles were no match for the Truth that was about to overtake me. It came with the Gail force of an unforeseen, unexpected rip tsunami. I felt this strong current before. Normally I just went against the tide and did the backstroke until I was again at ease in my own way. Breast stroking safely in nine feet into a six feet pool of carnality.
Not today. Waves of emptiness begin to hit me. I kicked. I paddled. I thought I could wade in the shallow in of my mind with positive superficial thoughts. I tried to hold my breath. With each passing air bubble coming up before me, the reality of my selfishness and pride hit me like a tidal wave.
My eyes darting here and there frantically looking for the lifeguard of secularism. Today somehow, he gave up his post. There was not even life preserver relativity in site.
I belted out one last defiant cry, and then my eyes grew dim. My lungs grew tired and begin to fill with a liquid that was foreign to me. This was not the murky pool of darkness that shrouded me in the comfort of my own ideology. This water was pure.
The oxygen that caused me to thrive, live and breathe by my own way and right was now being depleted from every pore of my body. I was flailing, moving about in vein. So I decided to do the Dead Manís Float. I thought it would buy me some time. The irony was that I was literally dying. The light of my path grew dim. I close my eyes, cease to struggle. I am alone.
Inevitably I drifted like an unclaimed piece of debris into the abyss of the Deep End. Even in my unconscious state, I could feel tidal waves of anguish and longing flooding my soul. Tell me who can escape the all-encompassing ever Seeing Eye of the Beholder? There is no escape for me.
My very thoughts of regret of swimming in the Broad Way Bay now come to surface and betray me. Limp and weak I yield myself to volatile collide with the Current of Truth. I am caught up in the reef of Mercy.
No longer able to cling to the floating devices of fantasy. I surrendered into His peace. My mind was silenced yet my senses were not abated. I awaken in the comfort of warm transparent water and light. As I floated in this Sea of Salvation, I surveyed my surroundings and saw that it was good. I allowed myself to be washed and I rested.
Deep down I knew along that as long as I kept free styling in the pool of Perversion, my death was imminent and certain. I died today in the Pool of sin today. Only to be awaken and resurrected in the Sea of Shalom. I am content swimming my laps in Redemption River.
I realized with every stroke I took in the previous pool which in all actuality was shell of a pond, with every stroke, I was drowning my own destiny. I met with my demise of being my own god in that pool.
The Glory of His Greatness, the Tidal waves of His love rescued me. I am now a steady stream that ebbs and flows endlessly without limits. With every new tide of Revelation I rise.