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Gary Gullible meets the apes
by Rod Smith
11/26/07
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Sixteen-year-old Gary Gullible gazed at the TV. A documentary had just finished. He’d watched fascinated at the pictures showing what they said was man’s gradual evolution from the apes. The commentary had also sounded very convincing.

In the first picture he’d seen a large, hairy ape in an all-fours position. Next, the ape was not crouching as much – and slightly less hairy. So it went, each picture making the ape appear more human, until the last picture showed the ape standing tall like a human, definitely much less hairy now.

Let me think this through, Gary mused. If we evolved from the apes over all those years, they must have at least as much brain power as the humans of today. It’s logical, he thought. After all, they’re our great, great, great . . . grandfathers.

He’d grown up in a small town with no zoo, so he’d never seen an ape up close. Now he was in a big city with a large zoo, and he determined to go see these extraordinary creatures the next day.

The zoo looked resplendent in the morning sunlight. He saw the apes from a distance, and an attendant was working near to the enclosure.

“Hi” Gary said. The man nodded.

“These animals must be awesome.” Gary pointed to the apes.

“What makes you say that?” the man questioned.

“Well, I saw this documentary on TV that says we’re descended from them. I mean, look at all the things humans have invented. If we’re descended from the apes, they must be at least as smart as us.”

“Not from what I’ve seen,” the attendant said. “Been watchin’ these creatures for ten years. Gorillas, chimps, they just jabber in their lingo, swing on the trees, scratch their belly and hang on the fence. Smartest thing I ever seen ‘em do was peel a banana.”

“Matter of fact,” the man continued, “I heard about that evolution thing too. Thought I’d test these here apes. So I gave one a pen and a piece of paper, thinkin’ he’d write sump’n. He looked at the pen, tasted it, then smashed the pen against the fence. Then he chewed the paper.”

Gary was downcast. “Okay, thanks. Nice talking to you.”

“My pleasure,” the man smiled.

Gary gazed at the apes for a half-hour, and they behaved exactly as the man had said. He couldn’t picture one of them designing a house or a spacecraft.

Arriving home, Gary saw a package in the mailbox. His face brightened. It would be his birthday in two days time. Ha, a gift, he thought.

Carefully he unwrapped it. Yes, his Aunt Florence had sent a Bible. He’d never read one, but thought he’d start at the beginning. It was called Genesis.

It told how God created the world and every creature in six days. Then it said God made a man (Adam) in his own image, and gave man dominion over every creature. Then it said God made a woman as a helper for the man.

That sounds more like the truth to me, Gary thought; probably man has a creative brain because God gave it. He made up his mind to keep on reading this Bible and find out more about God.

[I'm not in Private Messenger]

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