A young lady that I was recently dating was as she likes to say, "backed into a corner".
As I recall, when we first met she called me regularly and at all times of hours. She even took pleasure in me falling asleep on her on the phone. She would even laugh about it, when I asked her the next day, "Did I really fall to sleep on you?"
As time went on, and she started to realize that my convictions and what I preached were also the way that I lived, I noticed that her phone calls were coming less frequently. On those occassions in which we would get back together to go to a movie, I would notice a glaze in her eyes. It wasn't a glaze of, "I'm so happy to see you again". It was more of a glaze of anxiety, a glaze of fear of getting busted, a glaze of guilt. I know that glaze, I've seen it before in my ex-wife whenever I came back from a short term trip.
It was then that I started to ask this question on a regular basis, "Have you been a good girl?". Never did I get a, "What do you mean?" Because I believe she knew what I meant. I, at first, would receive a "Uh huh". Shortly thereafter, those "Uh huh"'s turned into a question that was diverted.
It was just a couple of days, that she finally answered the question. She told me that she was sleeping with some other guy to 'fill her needs' and to supplement her desire to sleep with me.
I was not shocked by this revelation, disappointed - yes, but shocked - no. Many people want a godly man or woman. The single mothers want a godly man to help raise their children. The single fathers want a godly woman to help raise their children. But yet, they don't want to be godly themselves.
I will continue to minister to this young lady as a friend, but as a friend alone. My prayer is that she will be open for intervention from some of the sisters in the faith. Due to accountability, my role in her restoration will have to be physically minimal.
On a note, as Christian singles, we have to be careful of not damaging our testimonies by, "filling our needs". For some of us, we have a powerful testimony of being virgins. For some of us, we have a powerful testimony of being born again virgins. Don't allow your testimony to be that of having slept with numerous people during your walk as a Christian, because you thought 'he or she' was going to be the one.
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