I love you Lord. I have a heavy heart tonight and I’ve tried to pray, “to the Father, in your name,” but the burden is too great for me this time. I am so overwhelmed that I can’t even keep my thoughts focused, let alone my words.
I just finished reading a long, heartfelt letter from some friends half way around the world. You know the details of their situation so if you would, please hear the aching in my heart for them and give them a dose of your, “peace beyond understanding,” to lift them up.
I remember several years ago going to an Easter Program sponsored by a Christian Bible School. I recall how I felt as the commentator described some of the things you experienced on the cross. He described how you saw every child that had ever been or would ever be molested and the pain you must have felt for them. And, how you knew every alcoholic, drug addict, and adulterer down through the ages. You saw every sin, of every sinner in history past and forward into eternity. However, it was your love for each of them that kept you on that cross. For some reason the picture he described has stayed with me until this day.
Somewhere in Your Word it says something like, “with knowledge comes great sorrow.” I have found this to be true in my own life. As the years go by I recognize that the more I know about the “sinful nature” of man the burden that I feel constantly gets heavier. I realize that it’s not my burden to carry because you told me that you would carry it for me. I guess what I’m trying to say is that the more I learn the more I understand the sorrow that you choose to experience for your children. This only serves to make me love you more.
I am also finding that the more that I love you, the more I love your “called out ones,” the family of God. The more that I learn to love them the more I learn to share their sorrow. The more I learn to share their sorrow, the more I learn to love them. The more I learn to love them the more I learn to love you. I believe that you have shown me one of the many areas in which the writers of scripture exhort us to “become more Christ like.”
I’ve always perceived this Christ likeness to be in the form of, being Holy, being more perfect, striving to be a better person. These are all things that I feel are so unattainable due to the obstacles provided by my own mind and heart. It was only when I caught myself loving others even more than myself did I receive the blessing that I was indeed becoming more like you. As I share their burdens in loving prayer I come to a greater and stronger understanding of your love for us that ultimately led you to Calvary.
It may sound like a reoccurring cycle as I try to find the right words to describe my feelings, but maybe that’s what you’re trying to show me. After all, it is, “Your Word” that tells me, “We love Him because He first loved us.”
You are the one who created this reoccurring cycle. Thank you for loving me first and thank you for the, “sweet Salvation” you have provided for me.
Please watch over my friends Lord. Show them that they can see and feel your love even in the midst of their darkest nights. Remind them, that the day is coming when they can look back and see the footprints of the One who carried them through this time. Continue to love them Lord so that they may continue to love others and grow to be more like you. Please remind them of my love for them and that it was the motivation behind this letter to You, in their honor.