This is our Testimony, of God's Miracle Christmas of "2004"
No one ever said life was going to be easy. That saying never rang so true until my husband Bob went to Iowa City for what we thought to be a routine surgery on his aneurysm. Although we understood it to be major surgery we had been told the procedure had been done for years with much success. We had opted to have the big surgery done while he was a candidate for the stint we had been told that it was still new and one would be glued to the doctors hip with that procedure and if it leaked he'd have to have the big one done anyway. So we thought, lets just have the big one and get it over with. It will be a one-time deal. That morning of December 6th, ď2004Ē the day of surgery Bob was the one that drove down to Iowa City. I had talked my sister Darcy into going with us to sit with me during his surgery. Bob kept insisting I shouldn't go alone. While we all had the normal amount of tension knowing it was going to be major surgery. I had no expectations of anything going wrong. My sister Darcy and I were in the waiting room playing on the computer to pass the time. It seems it must have been about 2 hours into the surgery time when the doctor came out and told us they were having problems in the OR. No one knew what was wrong but it was serious. I nodded my head and still did not understand how very wrong things were going. Another hour seemed to pass by and once again the doctor came out to speak to us. He said; you need to know this is very serious. Very, very serious! I knew things must be getting worse but I didn't really grasp what he was even saying then. After about five hours in the OR the doctor came out and told me that they had moved him out of the OR into the ICU surgical unit. Things had become so serious they couldnít even sew him back up. The surgery had to stop and they had said they had barely gotten started when things went crazy. I was called back to his room and told things did not look good at all. One of the doctors had pulled me aside and said eventually I was going to have to make a decision and that eventually Bob's heart was going to stop. And he said, I advise you not to even resuscitate him, as his heart wonít be able to take it. He said you don't have to decide now.
I must have been in shock when the reality of what he was saying was sinking in. I remember feeling numb all over like this wasn't really happening to me. I made the calls I needed to my family and work and advised them of the situation. And I did what I had to do. I went back into the ICU room to watch my husband of 22 years die before my eyes. I can't remember how many doctors were in that room. When they called me stat back to ICU they were all standing around waiting it seemed. My father and sister and mother came running back to be by my side. I was just standing there by his bed, waiting for something, anything to happen. The hospital preacher had found me in ICU. And had asked what I wanted her to do? I said say a prayer for him. She said do you want me to place him in Jesus hands? I said yes. I stood watching the machines get lower and lower and I remember stepping back and saying out loud. ĎOh my God, Jesus is taking him!" My father walked around to the end of his bed and I watched as he pinched Bob hard on his toes. He walked to Bobs other side and said, " Bob nowís the time to fight if youíre going to!" The preacher standing by my side asked, are you letting him go? I screamed, " No!" Suddenly the room became very busy. The doctors were all moving around doing what ever they could. His surgeon Hoballah asked me who had done Bob's heart surgery and I said, " Nichols." He seemed to rush from the room. Upon his return he was telling the staff to turn Bob on his side. I stood there quietly as massive amounts of fluid came gushing from Bobís mouth. The nurse stood there with suction and tried to keep up with it. And I stood there in silence and whispered almost to myself, Oh, my God. I hope itís not too late. The preacher said; " what?" I said, "He was drowning in his own fluid. I hope it isnít to late!" She asked, "What do you mean?" I said, itís been all day; he hasnít had any oxygen all day." My voice quivered now drained and desperate! Eventually it seemed his fluid had subsided and they were pushing oxygen into his lungs. I remember listening to the doctors all speak as if I wasnít there. I heard them as they said they had him on 100 percent oxygen already and an oxidation booster machine that they couldnít leave on for to long. But even then I knew they were pushing beyond their medical knowledge foraging into the unknown medical science. Grasping at what they believed to be useless attempts to save one life. I stood and watched as they put the ventilator on him and spoke about how low his blood pressure had become. There were so many machines in that room that he was hooked up to that the two beds ICU room became a one bed. He was on the brink. Seconds away from death and everyone in the room knew it was a grasp at beating death at his door. I found out later his chances of making it were less than five percent. Sometime later I felt suddenly weak as I would pass out and I sadly said, " I donít feel very good. I have to go lye down." I left the room that my husband was dying in and lay down on a coach in the waiting room. Some time later the surgeon HobAllah came out and spoke to me. He said, we have done all we can do, I nodded, as he said, Iím going home now to get some rest. Is there anything I can do for you?" I said, "No you have already done all you can. I lay there on the coach curled up in a ball like a baby and felt so very alone. My brother Patrick pushed a coach up to mine and put his arms around me and held me. And it was there I found comfort on that night. I lay there and listened to some of my family joined together in one spirit of support. My brother Kurt and his friend Tom had drove up. My brother Patrick and his wife Justine My sister in-law Jonnie, my niece Rainbow and a friend at the time and my parents we all gathered together in the waiting room. And still I refused to believe the reality of what was happening to my world. I awoke the next morning after a sleepless night to find Bob had made it through the night and that was a miracle of itís own. The intern doctor that second night had called us back to his room in ICU and said they had turned him on his back and he had coded so they had to pump him to bring him back but he said it only took all of about five minutes. He said I brought him out of the coma just to see if he was there and I wanted you to see this. He said speak to him. There we all stood by his bedside and said "Bob, Bob as he opened his eyes and looked at us. I canít ever remember feeling such a warm feeling of faith. My sister later said he had squeezed her hand. The doctor said I have to put him right back under but I wanted you to see he was there after all he has been through. They had put him on a rotating bed that was normally used for quadriplegics. After his heart had stopped to help keep the fluids off his lungs. He was put back into an induced coma and strapped to the bed so he wouldnít fall out of it. And I knew we were blessed to of had even that tiny moment with him. The doctor then looked at us and said, ĒSo the hope is!Ē And that was the first time I really felt that yes, there was hope and something we could hold onto. We all joined together at that time and we knew what we had to do. We had to stop wasting time and get to praying to our God, our higher power for a miracle. It was then that my brother and my family and I all joined hands and started to believe. My brotherís wife a nurse said he wasnít going to make it. But she told my brother whatís more important is what do you think. Patrick said to her, were bringing him home. And it was on that faith she stood with us. He looked at me as we watched the machines and the numbers change on them. And we asked the nurse what those numbers should be. And what was good numbers? My brother looked at me and simply said," I can change those numbers and I said to him, you can?" He said, í yes!í I said, í okayí I had no doubt I just joined with him in working with the nurse on duty and his prayer and getting on the invisible waves. I donít know how to this day he did it but I swear he did as God is my witness and we watched those numbers change each time we went into that room. Justine, his wife my sister-in-law Jonnie and myself can all give witness to this. The whole family came together in faith. I had called upon the Holy Spirit to fill his room with the protection of Godís almighty light. And called upon a hundred angels to be by his side. My brother the same in his worship called upon Mother Nature and the buffalosí and eagles and such. I remember standing there across the bed from him and saying, "I donít know whom your using but Iím using the Holy Spirit and they must be getting along. We even placed my niece Rachel at his bedside for the spirit of a child. Her mother Justine faithfully brought her up with her every weekend to be with us in ICU. I never saw a stronger child around such gloom. She would go into the room with us each time we prayed and stand there bravely at Bobís bedside and say to him over and over again, ďlove you Bob!Ē Iím sure some of the nurses thought we had gone mad in our display of faith. And others couldnít believe what they saw with their own eyes. I walked out of his room once and the intern doctor pulled me aside and said, "We donít know whatís going on in that room but thereís some kind of magic and weíre just all staying out of the way." I told her, íthatís not magic thatís GOD in there. She said heís in the whole room! I said I know. In the beginning of those days that turned into weeks I remembered a message I had received from God before Christmas. The words that stuck in my mind was I would understand the meaning later and I would call upon him in my faith. And I thought about all the Christmas poems I had already wrapped for our family. Godís spirituality and messages to be heard and I knew then that he knew all of this was going to happen. He knew and had told me way before to draw my strength from him. And it was that strength I used to pray. As I went into that ICU room time and time again to pray. My brother had written a simple poem called GODíS ROCK that I planned to share with the family this year along with a special message I had gotten from God. And I said to him in those first few days. We have to get Godís Rock here. And it just seemed to be the right thing to do. We had his wife Justine brings up the paper and copies of the simple poem and small plastic bags as we bagged up the poems with one small rock. Godís rock! And that was the faith we stood on that Christmas of 2004. We must have made over five hundred or more. Keeping ourselves busy doing Godís work. I watched as people in the waiting room took those packages and held onto the hope found there. I watched as they spoke of how they were taping the rock in their loved oneí rooms. I watched and I smiled to see such a little thing bring hope. And in those days my brother Patrick stood as Godís rock by his faith with me. And we each gave of our spirits and soul to save his. We joined as one spirit and called upon other spirits to help mend his broken spirit. And we did believe and have faith. We battled the negatives and replaced them with the positives and when we couldnít see a positive we made one on our own. I learnt what it meant then to ask and go! Donít think, my brother would say to me, know! And upon my faith I did just that.
My brother Patrick and his wife Justine one day decided to take a break from the hospital and went to good will. Upon their return they had bought all kinds of stuffed animals. They said they were for the children in ICU waiting with other families. And my niece Rachael went around passing them out to kids and I watched the smiles it put on their little faces. God indeed did work in mysterious ways.
As the days past I watched as Bob swelled up like a balloon and became as the incredible hulk only not green and it wasnít at all cool to look that way. He was so swollen that the edema in his hands was splitting open his skin. I finally had all I could stand and I said to the doctor. My God, how much bigger can he get? Iím afraid heís going to start splitting open all over. The doctor said well we were pushing the fluids in him because his kidneys werenít filtering. But they are starting to now so we should be able to give him something to start loosing the fluids. I said, I thought he was producing urine fine and he said, he was but he wasnít filtering it. I remember feeling very angry as I said, so you didnít lie to me you just didnít tell me the whole truth. Thatís nice. I felt a million miles away from their medical understanding and didnít like the feeling at all of not really knowing what the heck was going on. All we did for days on end was pray and pray and pray. It became so normal that I forgot all about the people around us. The doctors and nurses and interns I only knew there was our higher power and us. And Our God was going to hear our prayers. My brother was put in charge of making me eat and shower and take care of myself. He and others took over the phone calls that had become too much for me. And when my brother Patrick and his wife Justine would take a break and leave the hospital to get something to eat. My niece Rachael would say, Iím staying with Eva. Someoneís has to watch her. And I realized how very grown up she was for her young age of nine. All I could deal with was going into that room and praying every chance we got. And we held on to those baby steps that God gave us each day. Even when the darkness closed in he still shone his light down and let us knows he was with us.
We battled together for those five weeks in ICU. When we couldnít visit we spent quiet time putting together Godís Rock. Writing poetry and drawing and coloring. One night my sister in-law Justine and niece Rachael and I had a contest of writing poetry. We would take turns picking a subject and then we all three had to write one. It was quite fun and very silly when we got done with them. But we needed the humor to help sustain us. Anything to keep our minds busy In fact most nights we would find ourselves laughing hysterically as a positive way to release all the tension we had. It was either that or cry. I gave into crying once when they told me about the blood fungus. I was really starting to feel hopeless and I laid on the coach in the waiting room and cried. My brother came over to me and kneeled down and put his arms around me and simply said. If you need to cry go ahead and cry.
There was even a sixteen-year-old girl that we welcomed to our cubicle that was there for her Grandma in ICU. Her name was Alicia she said to us she was scared to be by herself. So we brought her into our protective fold. We told her our story and she said she never really had faith before. But after listening to us she saw things quite different now. She sat in the T.V. room with us and colored. And drew from our faith.
Another night there was a homeless guy looking for a place to lay his head that we told we had an extra coach in our cubical. He had come in late at night and seemed to be quite upset, there wasnít any cubicles left to lay his head. I said to him, hey buddy we have an extra coach in our cubicle. He said okay. Funny at that time I never realized he was homeless. It was actually a few days after I had given it some thought and realized it.
Then there was Pops. He was an older man that had been there for months in ICU waiting for his wife to die. It was just a matter of time. My brother and I fixed him up with what we called a pillow top bed with pillows and pushed two coaches together. It was almost like a full size bed. He said that was the best sleep heíd had since heíd been there.
The blood fungus that no one knew how Bob got, what was that anyways? . I remember when they came to us and said that they were having trouble getting rid of the blood fungus and that it was very serious. And we prayed over him that night and I said to my brother Patrick. There must be a way to get in there and get the bad blood out and get the good blood in but I donít know how. And I fell asleep that night praying to God about just that. The next day the doctors came to us and said Bob was bleeding and they didnít know from where. I said, if itís not life threatening donít do anything right now. He has already been through too much. The next day they had given him a couple pints of fresh blood. And then the next thing I knew they were telling me that the blood fungus was no longer a concern. And I knew that God had taken out that bad blood and the doctors had put the new blood in. It was just that simple for me. I never heard of a blood fungus before.
His lungs full of fluids fighting for his life I remember praying to God about his lungs and asking the Holy Spirit to work through me and use my body as a guide. To use my lungs, my kidneys, my oxygen, my breathe. Funny some how I knew when I asked that he would know what to do. The next day I spoke with a doctor and I said tell me how is his lungs? The doctor said if I showed his x-ray to a doctor that didnít know he had Acute Respiratory Failure he wouldnít know it. I said to him. So the lungs healed themselves? And he looked in awe at me and repeated, so the lungs healed themselves. As I smiled knowing that the Holy Spirit had indeed healed his lungs as I had prayed. And those words God gave me to share with my family came back to me again and again with the clear message it held. .
The doctors came to us again another day and said he will need some level of assisted living. They didnít feel he was there. They felt it had been just too long for him to go without oxygen. "I said, no your wrong! Heís there! We have been communicating with him. And I walked to Bobís side of the bed and said, Bob you donít listen to those doctors do you hear me? We didnít come this far for you to give up now. Youíre a better man than that. You fight! Do you hear me you fight! Patrick and I both went in that night and spoke to Bob. We asked him to come out of his peaceful place and get to work. That the doctors needed to see him move I remember saying to Bob, just concentrate on one thing. One finger or a toe put all your effort into that one spot and try to move it. I said remember when you had polio as a kid. Itís just like that Bob. And I asked him to let the wild horses go and give them the lead. They would find their way home. And Patrick also spoke to him alone. And I asked Patrick canít you catch a wave into his brain? There must be a way to get in there. And he said, itís like the phones ringing but he doesnít answer it. He has to answer it or we canít talk to him. Later that night after he spent time alone with Bob he told me he was able to get in to him on the wave. All I know is the next day he moved his fingers for us. And I was excited. When I told the nurse they refused to believe he was doing it. They said he is just moving sporadically. I said no, you are wrong. He is there. I went in to his room one night and he lay there uncovered and I thought about how he hates to get cold. And I asked the nurse; can you get him a blanket? He hates to get cold. She just looked at me. Finally she went and got him a sheet. The doctor came and found us in the ICU shortly after that and said yaw know itís a good thing you guys spoke to him before because other wise why are we doing all this if he is already brain dead. I agreed this was true. He said maybe it was just too long for him without oxygen. I said, No you are wrong! He is there! My brother walked over to us and agreed. Hoballah said okay Iím with you guys. And he walked away.
I believe it was Christmas Eve when God gave us our Miracle and we saw life breathed back into Bobís body. Rachael had been left in charge of me while my brother and wife went to get something for us to it. I had heard about the Hospital having a service for Christmas Eve So I asked Rachael if she wanted to go with me. She said yes. So we found the room and floor they was having it on. And I thought about my family what they would all be doing at home. It has been a family tradition for some time now to go to the Christmas Eve candle light service at Church. This year they went with a few less of us. I said, to my brother and wife, lets pray for Miracles to happen tonight for everyone in ICU. And so we did. Weíll never know how many prayers God answered that night. We only know we prayed in his light. With the faith of knowing, not hoping or wishing but knowing! And even on Christmas in that ICU waiting room the families decorated their cubicles and celebrated Christmas with faith. I called my family who had gathered at my brother Kurtís house and asked the Christmas message I received be read to them while I was on the phone. And I listened to them cry as it took three of them to read it. And my sister Darcy said, this is the worse Christmas I have ever had. And I said no! This is the best Christmas I ever had. What better gift to receive then the gift of life. This is truly what Christmas is about. Not all the presents. And I will always remember this as the Christmas we came together in faith. And all became part of a Miracle that was always Godís plan. And he said believe in my name and I will do great things. In your faith be yee renewed. I wrote the poem BABY STEPS and watched as my brother Patrick worked Bobís arms and legs and did therapy with him as the help was all off for the holidays. And he would take Bobís hand and put pressure on it. He said it was sending dolphins to his brain. And upon their return Bob was sitting up in bed and able to move his knees up and down. And they didnít know what happened. But we did. Every time something negative came up I would say out loud, ďGod has given us a miracle and heís going to see it through! And that was the faith I stood on.
They prematurely after five weeks in ICU decided to move Bob out of ICU onto a monitored floor. I was not happy with the care he received to say the least and questioned what a monitored floor meant. My brother who had been with me the whole time had gone home two days prior and I had fallen apart very quickly. He had written me a stay positive letter and I might as well have tossed it into the wind. I was so short fused and frustrated with Bobís care or lack of it in my eyes that I walked the hallway and literally sobbed. Feeling totally frustrated and torn. Tired and beaten and worse of all alone! It was then I made the decision it indeed was time to come home to gain a different prospective on his level of care. In the beginning he seemed to know me but at other times not. I could tell he was very confused and I encouraged him to sit up and try to move. My brother told him to do ices metrics in his bed. The first day in rehab I remember he told them not today. Tomorrow. And they left him in bed. The second day I was there and said oh no, you said that yesterday you have to do this. I know you can. And he tried because he was too proud to do anything else. I watched as he took those first few steps and stopped and said I canít do this! And I watched as he asked for a walker that gave him support and safety as he built his strength. One day my dad showed up with our Lab Bear. He brought him right into the hospital. I couldnít believe he got him in his car. But there he was in Bobís room and Bob had the biggest smile on his face. He went right to Bobís side and sat. Then I brought pictures in from home of when Bob had worked on our house and he said that was the turning point for him. When he started to realize who he was. And things kept coming back to him after that. They told me he would be in rehab for six to eight weeks. He came home in three. He defied all the odds and said I am going home! I've had enough of hospitals and itís enough. I'm going home. And they knew his determination and stood aside as he walked with his head held high that day. Without a walker and without a cane, without an arm to lean on! Proud! His rehab doctor called him John Wayne for his true grit I think.
I have never known such inner stamina in a person that pushes one forward like that. The pride and determination is what my brother and I both had gambled on in those first days. I remember saying, they don't know him like we do. And they didn't. It pulls at my heart to see his pain. I had no sooner had gotten back to work and I went into posttraumatic stress and I had a sudden rage against the world. I was mad. Madder than I had ever been before. Uncontrollable with pure negative energy! And it had control. I had never experienced anything like this. This prolonged anger at the world. Feeling betrayed by my loved and trusted ones I went into a frenzy of personal hell. When I think about it now I realize it was all that negatively that had been knocking at my door when I was in Iowa City. And I realized then that it was Satan himself we had done battle with and had won. My God we had won! And now in my weakness he is torturing me. And all the negative waves hit me cold in my face. And I knew not who I was anymore. I couldn't deal with work or home or family. I was blowing up at everyone and thinking I had the right to do so. Then suddenly as quickly as it had all stormed me it went away in a breath. And I realized that I had to go through this negativity to appreciate where I had been on the positive side. And I knew that what had happened was Divine and God gave us a miracle and made us part of it. And as hard as it is to remain in his light on this earth I know it is there for my protection. For all of us!
I went to a counselor and immediately felt a connection as she told me she believed in Angels. And I thought wow this is really cool. She understands what I am saying. She doesn't think I'm crazy like everyone else. I told my brother Patrick about her and I said to him, you would like her. And it has been six months now since Bob has been out of the hospital. Six months of healing physically and emotionally and spiritually. And even now I have to stop and tell my self it doesn't matter. Let it go. Take a deep breath and suck in some of that positive energy. No one will ever truly know and understand the miracle we became a part of. Not even us totally. I know that I am in awe to have been a part of it as well as a witness. And this is my testimony. By our faith in Him he was healed. Believe with all your heart, soul and body. Godís will is always done anyway. But he gives the greatest of gifts and one of these is life in the body we know on earth. The road of my faith is not over and it shall continue to be tested. I received the message clear and told my brother, I told him I don't know what or when or who but we are going to be called upon again. To join together and it gave me a feeling of pure glory to know I am to be apart of Gods miracles. Like my brother said. Dot-to-Dot we are connected. It matters not to me that there is those that don't believe. I know that God breathed life back into a body that was dead. I know because I was there and watched it unfold like the blooming of a beautiful rose. And we all know what a leap of faith we all took. And what it meant to ask and go! Donít doubt or question, donít think Know!
And now Bob says, ďI am angry I have lost my left eye. I have this bulge, this surgical hernia that hurts on my side. I have a hole in my throat and have trouble talking and I still have an aneurysm that has grown. And I say to him I understand how you feel. But think what the alternative would have been? This has been a test of our faith in so many ways. I know one thing that Bob gained through all of this. His heart did soften and the Holy Spirit did hold him in his arms and his soul was joined in the circle of our Fathers. And that was the day his soul was saved.
When he received eternal life!
(c)Eva Marie Ann Dunlap
This was the message I received before Christmas before we were to go to Iowa City. I had typed it out for each of my family to give to them at Christmas along with the spiritual poems I had picked out and framed with decorative paper and wood frames. Little did I know what this message really meant at the time! Or how much I would draw my strength from it.
TO OUR FAMILY LOVING WORDS FROM THE HEART OF A POET
We havenít got allot of money this year to give presents like we want too. But I thought a few words from my heart would do. Many Christmasís weíve Shared together all as one! A bond of love and family oh, hasnít it been fun? Just the joining together and going to Church. The candle light services and worshiping
Has been Godís Blessing. Worshipping our King. I want you all to know how much each one of you really means! You are everything! Each one of you unique and have your own personality. Thank God for the differences of what makes each of us who we are. Yes, I am a dreamer, as you all well know. I am a poet of the soul. I am happy that you know me for who I truly am. None of us are perfect. We all have our own crosses to bear. But I know God looks out for us. And weíll all get there. Through the love of one and other if nobody else! He always guides us with his Holy Ghost! Keep your hearts soft and warm and watch for judgment day. Judge not your brother for you have no right. Just remember to walk in His Holy Light. Thereís a reason each one of us was born. God made us special with a purpose. We just need to listen to our hearts and what we know to be right. When you pray remember to pray in His Light. Just ask for His protection from the darkness of night. When your down and lonely ask Him for a hug!
Heís always with us especially this time of year. For Christ was born on Christmas morn. He is our true savior. God is Love! Love is the ultimate commandment He wants us to keep! Without the love of God in our hearts we are nothing!
ďOUR FAMILYíS MESSAGE FROM HIMĒ
Bring your family unto Me and I shall comfort them. Tell them who I am. I bring them joy and understanding. Love unconditionally. I am the Father in this world. Fear not for it is I that am within you. For none can live without Me. I am the warm soft blanket you feel at night. I am the warm feeling of love and happiness in your soul. I am the everlasting glow upon this world. My light is the way to all things. Christmas isnít about the giving of gifts. It is about the sharing and caring. I have always been about the Loving.
Remember to love one and other. And comfort one to another. The time will come when you will draw your strength from Me. I will not forsake you. Remember the trinity and Me. I shall come in a flash of a light. And all will know that I am. Be ye not afraid as man. You are born of a new spirit in me. And you are a part of my family. Question not what I have said or that I have said it through this vessel. For I am the Light unto the world the path to eternity is through the Father and Me! I save all the sinners with My spilt blood. Come to Me and ask and ye shall be forgiven. Entering I into your body. The joining of a covenant! Remember Me always. Be not afraid to speak My name. Fear not My rejection. I love all my children!
~HOLY IS MY NAME~ SACRED IS THY PLACE~
~HEAVENíS GATE AWAITS~
Spreading HIS news from:Eva Marie Ann Dunlap
CHRISTMAS ~DECEMBER YR. ď2004Ē
To be continued!!
Eva Marie Ann Dunlap (c) 2005
The Miracle Of Godís Rock Christmas ď2004Ē
This is the Verse my Brother Pat Wrote that became part of God's Miracle Christmas ď2004Ē. We bagged this verse up with a polished rock in small plastic bags and handed them out in ICU in Iowa City at the University Hospital that Christmas of ď2004.Ē We did well over a thousand of them. Everyone that came to visit helped bag Godís Rock during that time. My sister in law Justine, my niece Rachael and Patrick my brother, and myself were there through it all. I remember my nephew Luke and my sister in law Susie came to visit and Luke jumped right in to bag Godís Rock. We had plenty of bags and printed slips of Godís Rocks but we had run out of the polished rocks we had bought to use. So everyone went out side for some fresh air and when they came back my nephew Luke started emptying his pockets. He kept taking Rocks out of his huge trench coat. I smiled at him and said where did you find all of those? He said, ďOut side.Ē My brother Pat said, ďI donít know where he found those! I havenít seen any Rocks out there laying around anywhere.Ē I just smiled and continued to bag up the rocks. You can't imagine the good feeling it gave not only us but also all that took one and read it and took hope from it. There was a guy one day that looked like a truck driver with his long gray beard, he stood tall and lanky as he spoke to us and we asked him, ďDid you get one of God's Rocks?Ē He patted his pocket smiled and said, ďNothing had happened for them in days in the ICU. When I took that rock into my Uncle's room I started singing a familiar song to him and he started to sing with me. That was the first signís of life we had seen from him in days.Ē And we knew then that God had given another Miracle in ICU. The Guy told us he believed it was the rock that caused this change. We told him it was the belief behind Godís Rock not the rock itself. The rock so small and yet so very huge! Godís Rock Indeed did work miracles in those days! And this is the rock we all stood on in all those days in ICU!
This is just one of my Testimonyís of Faith in those long days in Iowa City where my husband was fighting for his life.
Eva Marie Ann Dunlap
GOD'S ROCK INDEED
Pick up a rock what do you see
You hold a miracle God's gift indeed
It can be so simple if you just believe
Or use your will and give it a squeeze
Now open your hand and you will see
You can't make sand out of me
So count your blessings
One, two and three
They will never end
When you follow
Patrick Cagley © 2004
There was a lady in ICU in Iowa City we spoke to quite often while there. Her boyfriend who had been in an accident was also critical and in a coma. And had shown no signs of awakening yet. There had been no change in three weeks. She told us she took one of Godís Rockís that we had been passing out into his ICU room and she said things just started happening. It was the beginning of baby steps of the first signs of improvement in three weeks. She believed it was Godís Rock that made all the difference. We told her it was because she believed that it would. The whole point was that she believed in the power behind the Godís Rock. Another day a pastor was visiting a patient from his church. And he asked if he could take one of Godís Rocks and use it at his Church. He wanted to duplicate it and pass it out in Sunday school. We told him go right ahead! Take as many as you need. He replied I only need one of God's Rockís! I think back now and wonder how many different states Godís Rock ended up in. People in ICU in Iowa City came from all over the United States. It was supposed to be one of the best hospitals around and have the newest of medical equipment. And patients and family came from all over. And we watched and listened to hear the Miracles that God worked through Godís Rock in those days long days in ICU! We all looked for those baby steps of improvement in our loved oneís in ICU. That was the hope we all held onto! As long as there was movement of positive change, (no matter how small) the baby steps was God doing his work. We all stood on that Leap of Faith while our loved oneís were in ICU. Whenever anyone tried to say there was no hope I kept saying in those days of doubt. ďGod Gave Us A Miracle and Heís Going To See It Through!Ē This is the verse I wrote and held onto during those baby steps we all took in ICU in Iowa City the Christmas of 2004.
And this is one of my Testimonyís of Faith and Hope We all hung onto the Christmas of 2004!
We take things for granted when we are young.
What seems so natural when life begun
Like moving around and learning to crawl.
Standing up and taking that first fall.
It's like that for others when the body lays still.
It forgets how to move or the things that are real.
Your mind is a power that controls it all.
Your will is the most powerful of all.
You lay there and struggle and they all see you weep.
But I stand and smile you moved your feet.
I tell them they don't know you the way that we do.
That you can do anything you have a mind too.
Baby steps~Baby steps happening everyday
I stop and thank Jesus and pray and pray.
A miracle of God of love and giving
A new spirit in you that is living.
Your spirit is strong and we know you will fight.
And I keep telling you everything
is going to be all right.
We're taking you home we don't care what they say.
Baby steps~Baby steps all the way
Baby steps home~Home to Stay!
Eva Marie Ann Dunlap (c) 2004
Written for Bob with love Eva
Your Smile Within!
It had been going on three weeks that my husband Bob had been laying there in a coma in Iowa City. There had been so little signs of life in those long endless days. Each time we would go into his room and pray and pray. Everyone else could hardly bear to go in that room with him. He had swollen up like a balloon like nothing I had ever witnessed in my life and it all seemed so unreal. Lying there in a coma strapped on a bed that rotated constantly back and forth. The doctors said it would help to heal his lungs that had both collapsed when he went into Acute Respertory Distress while on the operating table. His skin had started to split open from the edema in his body due to his kidneys not functioning right and it was causing his skin to pull apart. My whole family had lost sight of any hope from the very beginning except for my brother Pat, his wife Justine and myself. My niece Rachael bless her heart at her young age of nine never did give up on hope either. And she seemed to go untouched by the darkness of death that loomed in that room. Funny we never really saw death in that room like they all did. We saw the light of God as we prayed and we cast out any doubt. We learnt to ask and go. My brother would say donít think! Know! Ask And Go! And that is just what we did in prayer as we prayed to God over and over again to heal Bobís body and give him back to us. I remember the first sign of life I saw on his face laying there in that bed in a coma in ICU. I stood to one side of him as my brother stood on the other and I saw Bob smile. Eyes closed and still in a coma, his face so severly swollen that you couldn't even see his eye lids any more. Rotating on that bed and I saw him smile. We had prayed that he would be in a place of peace. And knowing how much he loved horses we had asked that his spirit be allowed to run with them during this time so he would not be in any pain and he would be in a peaceful place during all this. I knew when I saw him smile that God had heard that prayer and he indeed was in that place of peace where there was no pain and God was holding him in his loving arms. We believed this to be truth with all our hearts! And this is just one of my testimonyís of our Unwavering Faith in God in those early days my husband lied in Iowaí City University Hospital ICU fighting for his life.
YOUR SMILE WITHIN
I saw your smile that was once worn.
It came at a time when everyone was forlorn.
But the spirit within you glows on your face.
You smiled and showed all God's grace.
It touched my soul to feel your warmth
it was a sign to me of things to come.
A new man created within. Feeling warmth and love again.
Your smile~ your smile I've never seen.
Heaven glowing on a human being!
Eva Marie Ann Dunlap (c) 2004
Written for Bob with love
Laughter In The Place Of Our Pain
The days grew long for us all while my husband fought for his life while laying in a hospital bed in ICU at the University of Iowa Hospitalís in Iowa City. We had been there day after day going on three weeks. I kept fighting back the tears that I felt wanted to be released as a flooding river within me. At the end of each day after the last visiting time in ICU we would settle into our cubical that we had come to call home. And one night trying to stay positive and not give into the despair we decided to make a game of writing verse, my sister in law Justine, her daughter Rachael and myself, it was all quite comical and we were all being very silly as if we were somewhere else and not in that ICU room! We started out by picking a word that we all had to write a verse with. They all turned out quite funny and we began to laugh hysterically afterwards. It was either that or cry. And so often we found ourselves laughing hysterically about nothing at all even up until we went to sleep and I remember thinking I hope everyone else doesnít think we are being insensitive. Because it was just our way of releasing all that despair and negative energy. We needed to stay focused and positive. So that none of us went into that ICU room with any doubt or negative energy. We had all agreed we didnít want Bob to know just how ill he was and we believed even in his coma he could hear what was going on! No one was allowed to go into the room unless they could handle what they saw. And if they did break down all we asked is that they leave his room so he would not hear them. We would surround ourselves with Godís positive light! And ask for it to be his protection during those days and we had prayed for a thousand angels to be at his bedside. I wrote these verses when my husband Bob had come out of the coma and had sat up in the bed and was able to speak to us. He spoke in a different personality at first and we found it all quite odd yet surreal.
These are the silly verses I wrote that night after he had come out of his coma in ICU while I was lying on the coach in our cubical that we had made into a bed in a place we now called home.
THE RED M-N-M
I am a red M-n-M
That stands for man and man.
That's what I am! All man!
Bob doesn't want to eat me.
Cause I keep him company.
He lets me sit on the end table.
Some would say this is a fable.
But I think it to be true.
I'm the only one left.
Bob ate the rest of you!
THE WEEPING WILLOW
I was a thought once.
Put there in your head.
From a magazine you read.
But you didn't give me a second thought.
You said you didn't have a big enough lot.
And now I'm stuck forever on this page.
Weeping willows always.
BOTTLE OF WATER
He said, "What kind of pop are you drinking there?"
I said, " I'm drinking a bottle of water."
I admit I felt a bit guilty
As I was sucking it down.
Cause Bob couldn't swallow anything
And I knew I was teasing him
With each drop I swallowed.
Poor guy he gets his in his vein.
What's to gain?
I can't wait until he can drink
A bottle of water again!
I BELIEVE IN ANGELS
I believe in angels.
God sends them with love.
I called a hundred of them in one night.
They remained at Bob's side
They protected him
With their heavenly wings
During his terrible experience
God gives us special gifts.
He sends us his heavenly light.
I believe in Angels. I believe in God.
I believe. I believe, I believe
In their love!
Eva Marie Ann Dunlap (c) 2005
The Unborn Child Of Godís
One of the Families we met while in Iowa City in the ICU room was an aunt and a father of a girl that was 17 and had been in an accident. She was fighting for her life on life support with no hope! I listened as they spoke among themselves about how long they should hold on before they had to make the decision. And my mind kept screaming, donít give up on hope! Donít let go of it! The doctors donít know everything. Pray to God He hears you! I watched as the aunt and her brother camped out also in ICU. Going into her room as we did in Bobís every time they had visiting time. And I listened as they said the doctors say there is nothing they can do. And they had decided they would wait a couple more days. We spoke to her, (The Aunt,) during that time and encouraged her to hold onto hope. She told us her niece was pregnant and they wanted to know if they should try to save the life inside her. She was not very far along. It tore at me to sit and listen and felt the anguish and the pain of those that loved her so. I wanted to tell them save the child! But it wasnít in my hands. It was in Godís hands now! They gave it much thought and discussion over the next few days and in the end they decided it would be too hard on her and the baby and there was so little hope of survival for the child anyways. I listened as they discussed their decision to donate what working organs she had left. And when I spoke to the aunt she said that was the only way they felt any of the tragedy made any sense to them at all. And my eyes watered with tears and I felt the gut wrenching pain that came with those decisionís they had made and later I felt so very drained and wondered how we would continue to hold on to the Hope in Godís Rock we had. All the lifeís that was saved from the donation of her organs will never be known. But I did over hear that one of her organs was used that very hour to save a life that had been waiting on a donor list. They usually never let you know who gets those organs but their paths met in ICU that day and they were able to put a name and a face to the gift of life their child had given! And that was their Miracle from God to give back a life that was lost!
This is my testimony to just one of the many stories of the tragedyís and Godís Miracleís that happened in ICU while in Iowa City at the University Hospital. During the Christmas of ď2004Ē
Eva Marie Ann Dunlap
They say it's a miracle what happened to you.
That you won't believe it~but it is all-true.
We know where we came from; we knew what to do
We call on our higher power to flow through you.
When all others gave up we hung on tight.
We encouraged you to continue the fight.
Jesus held you in His loving light.
And became your breath, your will, and your might!
He healed your lungs and breathed life back into you!
God works miracles and this is true.
We kept asking and He gave and gave.
It is true Jesus Christ does save.
You walked within the valley of doom.
It couldn't have been darker in that room.
Then God shone His light down on you.
And in all the glory of His name
He raised you up again and again!!!
Eva Marie Ann Dunlap ©2005
The Pillow Top Bed
During the first week while my husband Bob lay in a hospital bed in the ICU at the University Hospital in Iowa City we were camped out on coaches in a cubical that we had taken over for the family and ourselves. My brother had gotten the idea in his head we were going to be as comfortable as possible. So one night he said Iím going to make a pillow top bed. I laughed when he said it but I watched as he pushed two coaches together laying pillows all across the top of them and taking a top sheet tucking it in around them. That was the best I had slept in a week. It worked quite well but he decided that it would work even better if we had body pillows to use. So he and his wife Justine took a trip to K-Mart and bought body pillows. We felt somewhat guilty using all the hospital ones up so this took care of that issue as well. Everyone else had saw how we had made up a bed for our selfís and those that stayed any time at all in ICU soon was vying for the larger cubicles to camp out in and make beds themselves. Pat called them pillow top beds and they were. They were actually almost as comfortable as my bed at home. Almost but not quite! One night I was watching Pat and he went over to this older guyís cubical; the guy wasnít in it at the time. I said to him, ďWhat are you doing?Ē He replied, ďIím going to make Popís a pillow top bed.Ē Thatís what everyone called him. I smiled, as I watched him push the coaches together and lay the pillows on them as he tucked them in with the sheet and put a blanket on top of them. Now we had never spoken to Popís before this but later on we found out he had been there over three months waiting for his wife to pass. Her kidneys had stopped functioning and she was on dialysis and it was only a matter of time. He must have loved her so, the way he hung on during those days in ICU. We watched that night when he came back to his cubical and found a bed made instead of a coach! We watched him as he crawled up from the end of the bed and lay his head down in the middle of it curling up into a ball like a baby he fell sleep. I was so touched by the caring heart of my brother to think to do that and watching Popís fall to sleep it made me cry. And after that night my brother Pat made a pillow top bed for Popís every night until his wife had gotten worse and he starting spending every night by her side. When his family came we lay there and listened and heard the sonsí speak amongst themselves and knew his wife had passed. And I remember feeling so worried about Popís and what he would do now and how hard it would be on him to go home to an empty house. I was relieved to hear one of his sonís say ďYour coming home with me for a while Popís. That will give you time to spend with your grandson.Ē And I felt so relieved to know he would not have to go through this alone! And yet I felt so sad and so very alone at that moment in time!
God had taken one of his Angels and called her home to lye on His Big Pillow Top Bed Of Clouds in His Blazing Azure Sky!
And this is just one of my Testimonies of Faith and Love I Witnessed and Felt in ICU during Godís Miracleís on Earth the Christmas of 2004.
Eva Marie Ann Dunlap
Popís Pillow Top Bed
Hereís a pillow top bed Popís
To lye your weary tired head
In place of a worn old coach
That would make you say ouch!
Two coaches made into one
When pushed together what had become
A full Size bed for now a place
To lay your weary head!
Pillows all laid in a row.
With a top sheet tucked in just so.
And a blanket tossed on top
Provides warmth for our dear Popís.
In the morning when you rise
It gave so much to our open eyes.
To know people there all loved you so
Even those strangers as they would come and go.
All coming together as Godís family
And we all held onto His Light happily
To continue on with His fight to over come
Death that had taken itís run!
Here in this ICU waiting room!
I saw God Miracleís in place of doom.
While You lye there within a Coach
Made into a full size Pillow top Bed!
A soft place where Popís could now lay his head!
Eva Marie Ann Dunlap
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Dedicated To My Neice Racheal For Her Love and Strength and God's Promise Through a Child's Eyes!
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