I used to suffer from severe depression. I would lay on my couch and cry screaming at God for hours wanting to know why I wasn't healed. I would blame Him for everything. A woman I know told me to shake it off. I thought "What does that mean?" She never did have any other answer or did she tell me how to do it. I felt utterly hopeless. I thought I was completely crazy and worthless. Boy was I wrong!
I am healed! I didn't realize exactly when I was healed until recently. God opened my eyes to when, how and why I was healed.
First lets get to the when...It was over eight years ago when my baby boy was born. You see, I was blessed to have a son with birth defects. The nurses, doctors, and social workers all stressed that I needed to see a counselor since I already had such a history with depression. I didn't understand why but I didn't need one.
When I looked down at my beautiful baby I realized he needed me more than anything or anyone in this world could possibly need someone. I knew and loved God but never had the faith that was stirring up in me at that time and place. I finally felt the true love that He has for us and I learned how to "Let go and let God." A "fire" shot up through me and I had real true honest faith that God would heal this precious gift. You see when I was praying for my son I was being healed and didn't even realize it.
Now, this saddens me a bit but I know God will give me the words I need. My younger brother (whom I am very close to) told me he is going through depression and wants to commit suicide. All I could do was ask God for the words to help him, this was when He opened my eyes and showed me exactly what happened to me(how and when I was healed). I haven't gotten exactly what I need yet but I know it will come. God has helped me to talk to my brother about Christ without pushing him further away. I even received the awesome news that he went to church for the first time in years.
I do not regret having gone through this. I know God a has a mighty plan for the hurting souls out there through me and I can't wait!