How did Lot know they were angels, Lord?
The two angels came to Sodom in the evening;
and Lot was sitting in the gate of Sodom.
When Lot saw them, he rose to meet them,
and bowed himself with his face to the earth.
"I don't have any questions about
Sodom, or Lot, or anything, but....."
"Why not, child."
"Ech; I think that whole story is
pretty disgusting. Ech: wicked cities,
brimstone and fire, Lot's wife turning to salt,
and that whole business with his daughters in the cave.....ECH."
"No, Lord; actually my question is about the angels' appearance."
"What about it, child."
"Well, how did Lot know those guys were angels? I mean,
what, were they, like, wearing t-shirts, with the word
spelled out, 'I AM AN ANGEL'? I don't understand, Lord."
"T shirts, My beloved?"
"Well, You know, Lord: maybe not t-shirts, but something
like them. Was it the wings that gave Lot the clue?"
"No, My precious."
"Oh, You mean they're not allowed to show their wings
in front of us. I see."
"Was it the halos?"
"What halos, child?"
"OH, LORD!!! The halos over those guys' heads! Are
You sleepy, today, Lord? Are You reading Your email while
I'm talking to You, Lord? I really detest when folks do that, Lord."
"I don't have email, My precious."
"I guess You don't need it, huh?."
"My ears and eyes are on you, child, always."
"Thank You, Lord."
"So, what about it? Was it the wings, or the halos, that
gave them away, Lord?"
"Neither, child. It was Me."
"Oh, so You mean, Lot knew ahead of time the angels were
coming. You must have told him, Lord. I get it."
"Well, WHAT? WHAT, LORD? WHAT? TELL ME!"
"Don't yell at Me, child."
"I'm sorry, Father. I'm sorry!
I just don't understand. I mean, lopsided Lot offered to
bake matzo for Your angels, and even insisted on them staying at his house. How come?"
"That whole scene, Lord, seems very strange:
neighbors trying to break down the door,
barefoot angels chomping on matzo, and
then calmly telling their host that they
were about to tear down his entire city.....
that certainly wasn't very gracious of them,
"They were being very gracious, child."
"Yeah, I guess. But, they talked about
Your impending destruction, like they
were discussing the weather, Lord."
"So, what was with these angels, Lord; what gave them
"I did, child."
"So, like, if any of us see a couple of
angels, like....we're just going to know?"
"Okay! I'll quit asking, though if an
angel came to my house, I'd probably just
offer him some popcorn and a coke."
"Hey, Lord? I just saw this special, last night about global warming."
"I was just wondering........"
"Well, if Your fire and brimstone over Sodom was sort of
like their global warming....."
"Perhaps, My beloved."
"Really? I'm not trying to be funny, Lord! Is OUR global
warming, You know, eh.......like, the BEGINNING of OUR
......End of Days?"
"That is for Me to know, child."
"Our world is very wicked, Lord: worse than Sodom and
"I know ONE thing, Lord."
"What is that, daughter?"
"Well, if the angels come, and tell me not to look back
while I'm fleeing from the brimstone shower, I'm
not going to look back, Lord. I'm not going to look back."
"Continue to read My Word, child.
Continue to read My Word."
Then the Lord rained on Sodom and Gomorrah brimstone
and fire from the Lord out of Heaven;
and He overthrew those cities, and all the valley,
and all the inhabitants of the cities,
and what grew on the ground.
But, Lot's wife behind him looked back,
and she became a pillar of salt.
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