DAVID'S COLUMN Of Blogs And Blogging
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What does it mean?
Is it legal in every state? Do you need a special permit? Can people over 50 blog without hurting themselves? Is there a national blogging forecast service one can plug into? "Chance of blogging 35% on the east coast, moving up to 55% percent in the midwest, while the west coast is just neck deep in blog. The National Blogging Service is issuing a warning, some residents may need to be evacuated or moved to higher elevations..."
Is it medically advisable to do any blogging before breakfast, or within an hour after meals? If a blog fell down in the woods, would anyone be around to read it? How long will it be before real blogging will be made available in Third World countries? If all the neighbors gathered around for a blog party, would they have to bring their own wi-fi? (Don't get me STARTED on wi-fi-- Why? Fie!)
If someone started blogging at 45 mph from a train station in Chicago, and another person started blogging at 53 mph from a bus station in Memphis, what time would their blogs be read in New Orleans? Is a blog sandwich kosher? Are the pyramids just some left over blogging from aliens a long time ago? Are the hieroglyphs just some left over blog graphics? Were the ancient Egyptians the original bloggers, and we are just reincarnating their postings? Did Seth have more friends than Ptah? Did Isis have cooler blogs than Ra?
Two bloggers walk into a bar...
What happens if you DON'T get your 100% USRDA of blogging in a day? Will artificial or refined blogging replace natural whole blogging? If the Bible were being written today, would we have "Paul's Blog To The Galatians"? How many blogs can dance on the head of a pin? Where do blogs go after they die? Will we be deceived one day by the Anti-Blog?
Blog spelled backward is "golb". Does that mean ANYTHING?
Why doesn't the President blog? Is this a "Blog-gate Scandal"? 4 out of 5 dentists surveyed recommend blogging for their patients who do blog. To blog or not to blog, that is the question. Does anyone have to take their blog out for a walk? If blogging were illegal, would those providing blogging services be known as "blog-leggers"? Explain. Do we need to sign an international treaty regulating blogging in space?
If you had to list a blog's main ingredients on the side of the package, what would be listed first? What is the tallest blog in the world? What was the first #1 hit blog in the U.S.? In the U.K.? Why are they different? Did we smuggle Nazi bloggers out of Germany before the war ended? Can a blogger really be judged fairly by a panel of 12 peers? How can we curtail this rash of drive-by bloggings?
If you put three blogs into a blender, would it cure a hangover? Would four help? Who do you think will win the Super Blog this year? Can two blogs share the same space at the same time? What is the speed of blogging? Does a blog have an absolute freezing point? A melting point? A flash point? Is a blog a solid, a liquid or a gas? Animal, vegetable or mineral? Is it bigger than a breadbox?
Has a blog ever been captured in the wild? Is the Loch Ness Blog merely a myth? What about the mythical "Sasquatch Blog"? The "Abominable SnowBlog"? Do nice blogs really finish last? Do blonde blogs really have more fun? Will they come out with a Lite Blog? Will really it be "less filling"? Is there really a danger from Global Blogging? Will the "Bloghouse Effect" be a concern in our lifetime?
Do you have change for a blog?
Should professional bloggers be given any special consideration in criminal court? If you get your blog cancelled, can you upgrade your voucher after the fact? How old should a child be before their parents let them blog? Do those blog-free diets really work? If you hire a professional blogger to do your blog-work for you, do they HAVE to be union? Is cloning a blog ethical? Is caffeine-free blogging even worth it?
Who is "The Godfather of Blogging"? Is home-made blog always better than store-bought? Should "Seeing-Eye Blogs" be allowed on jetliners? Do blogs need to have leashes? Have airports been "socked in" because of blog? Do blogs lose their tails when they become adults? Are blogs best with butter or jam?
Looks like it might blog today...
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"Paul's Blog To The Galatians"........stop, ur killing me here. This was great! I had no idea what a blog is and haven't much cared to either. Until now. I'm surprised you didn't mention a Surgeon General warning about them; you covered just about everything else!