Hire
Writers
Editors
Home Tour About Read What's New Help Forums Join
My Account Login
Shop
Save
Support
E
Book
Store
Learn
About
Jesus
  



The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!



 
Holidays PLEASE ENCOURAGE THE AUTHOR BY COMMENTING

  LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE   SEND A PRIVATE MESSAGE
  HIRE THIS WRITER
REPORT ARTICLE

 TRACK THIS AUTHOR ADD TO MY FAVORITES
corner
What's New
 
corner
 
I Want a Mouthful
by Shanti Singh
12/14/06
Free to Share


  Mail
 





Letís face it. No one in his right mind wants nothing for Christmas besides two front teeth. Whoever made up that silly song must have never tried serious chewing.

I mean, what can you do with nothing but two front teeth? Get real. You could bite into an apple, maybe. But without bottom teeth, even that would be very difficult. Just for fun, letís give that Pollyanna song writer the benefit of the doubt and pretend itís possible to bite into an apple with nothing but two front teeth. Then what? Big whoop! Youíd have a bite of apple in your mouth, but wouldnít be able to chew it up. Swallowing would be downright dangerous!

Letís move on to another popular food item: hotdogs. No American diet is complete without hotdogs! Eating a hotdog with nothing but two front teeth would not be easy, but may be possible with the following creative technique:

(1) Set the hotdog on the table.
(2) Lean forward.
(3) Plunge your two precious teeth into the hotdog and make a sawing motion with your head.

Such an approach might result in the successful severing of the hotdog. But with nothing but two front teeth, the hotdog would also be a choking hazard, so I wouldnít advise it.

My advice? Donít ask Santa for nothing but two front teeth for Christmas; ask him for a mouthful. Only then will your stomach be satisfied and your life spared from lack of chewing. Merry Christmas, and bon appetite!





If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be! TRUST JESUS NOW

Read more articles by Shanti Singh or search for articles on the same topic or others.


Read More - Free Reprints, Main Site Articles, Most Read Articles or highly acclaimed Challenge Articles. Read Great New Release Christian Books for FREE in our Free Reads for Reviews Program. Christian writers can JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and help spread the Gospel.


The opinions expressed by authors do not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.

Hire a Christian Writer, Christian Writer Wanted, Christian Writer Needed, Christian Content Needed
Find a Christian Editor, Hire a Christian Editor, Christian Editor, Find a Christian Writer
 
corner
Corner
This article has been read 593 times     < Previous | Next >


Member Comments
Member Date
Tabiatha Tallent 21 Dec 2006
I'm so ROFLOL. This was so hilarious, I had a phone call right as I read the line about the 'sawing motion with your head' and had to let it keep ringing cause I was laughing so hard. Thanks for the giggle!
Marty Wellington  18 Dec 2006
Very cute take on the topic. I would have never thought of it from this angle. You're making me hungry. See you and Merry Christmas.
Catrina Bradley  15 Dec 2006
Cute take on the topic, Shanit! Made me giggle. :)
Sara Harricharan  14 Dec 2006
Loved this! Hilarious read and very creative on how to eat a hotdog, liked the title too.
dub W 14 Dec 2006
What fun read. Thanks for making my day.
Marilee Alvey 14 Dec 2006
What a neat, lighthearted take on the concept of only wanting two front teeth! There are just way too many goodies out there that require chewing. What about peanut brittle, for Pete's sake? See? Your funny story has gotten me thinking! Merry Christmas, Shanti! May yours be one of abundance with no tooth limits!




TRUST JESUS TODAY











Free Audio Bible
500 Plus Languages
Faith Comes By Hearing.com