First, I just want to thank You for Your tender mercy. How wonderful, how loving, how very like You to be merciful to someone like me. My praise for You is less than just meager, but I love You with all my heart. Thank You and thank You and thank You again.
I have a confession to make to You, before my peers, just as Your Word says we ought to do. I confess that I am afraid, though Your Word says, so many times, we are not to fear. I am afraid of going back out into the war zone. My scars are jagged and monstrous. I was not prepared for the battles Iíve fought. They tell me that the battle is Yours. I confess that I have not given them over to You.
Iíve learned along the way that my greatest strategy is to kneel, to pull the shield of faith over my head and remain knelt so that the fiery darts can do no damage. But it took standing there believing that I could withstand the darts to teach me that I cannot. Pride is such a foolish thing. I am weak. But it is in my weaknesses that I most know Your strength. Iíve also learned along the way that there comes a time when I must stand up, dig my shoes into the ground and fight back, using the Sword.
Father, my Sword needs to be gleaned. I confess to You that I have not kept it polished well. I also confess that I am not a very good swordsman. I am relying on You to glean my Sword and to teach me to properly use it. I know nothing whatsoever except what You teach me. I admit that I am nothing without You. But I know that I can do all things if You will but strengthen me. And so I ask for strength, for courage before You send me back out, as You surely will.
Thank You for this brief time of rest from the battles. Thank You for the streams Youíve cut out for me and led me to in the desert. Thank You for being my Portion and for keeping me safe and for nursing my many, many wounds. Yes, I am well. It is very well with my soul, though I am afraid.
Please forgive me for fearing the battles ahead. I know who wins the war and that it is my duty as Your child to fight the good fight. And so I ask You to glean my Sword for me. Cause me to receive Your Word in such a way that I can go to battle and be mightier in battle than I have been before, in Your image, in the image of The One Who is Mighty in Battle.
I trust You, my God, to cover me in Your shadow, to prepare me and protect me. I trust You to command Your angels to guard my ways. Thank You again for Your mercy, for forgiving me for failing You. I will be strong for You, Father, if You will but deliver me from this fear. I do want to be strong for You because I love Your ways, Your Word, Your decrees and commands. Put Your Words in my mouth, Father. Write them on my heart and in my mind so that I can be faithful in all that Youíve called me to be. Father please, glean my Sword.
Treava, you are the most honest writer that I know! I do want to gently remind you that our brother David, the man after God's own heart once said, "Whenever I am afraid, I will trust in YOU." We each have to deal with that spirit, but it is the CHOICE that we make when we do the dealing that COUNTS! I know that you will always run to our Lord whenever you are afraid. And like our brother, Peter, your heart's cry is, "Where is there to go, but to you, Lord!!!"
The battle is the Lord's indeed!
And you are a sure winner by humbly acknowledging your human weaknesses and God's strength. Onward Christian soldier..keep marchin on..better yet, keep on dancing (Smile) Love, Gloria
Oh, Treava...You have written the words that are on the hearts of every Christian! You are not alone in these feelings or fears, sweet friend...join hands with another right here, and I would guess with all who read your words!!! I applaud you, for you were brave enough to 'verbalize' your feelings - and I know your confession has touched God's heart, as well. If you didn't care about pleasing Him, you wouldn't be experiencing the remorse, the pain, the concern, the fears, the desire to strengthen your faith, and I could go on and on. You wouldn't see a need for all the 'searching' if you didn't want to reach God. HE SEES THAT, HE KNOWS THAT and HE WILL PROVIDE ALL YOU NEED TO BE VICTORIOUS! YOU CAN DO IT - God's armor is surrounding you and His TRUTH is leading you! God bless you for sharing so deeply and letting us peer into your heart. I love you. Peggy
Blessed are those who hunger and thirst after righteousness for they SHALL be filled. Your writing touches many hearts and lives. I can tell that Christ is truly in you. Jesus covers our eyes at times and its scary, but that just means HE IS next to us.
Your humility is awesome...thank you for being transparent. I know you have help someone today starting with me. We lead by example, I believe it was Paul who said follow me as I follow Christ. Congratulation! Your first battle has been conquered.
Oh Joyce, God loves you so very much and He will be with you through all of this. Ps.18:39-For You have armed me with strength for the battle; You have subdued under me those who rose up against me. May you never be hurt again, and may you be one of His finest warrior's.
I love you, sharon