Christian Living
When I was around nineteen years old I used to read things I now look on as ridiculous or false. I was so shy as a teenager that I once bought a paperback called How To Pick Up Girls. Even then I didn’t have to read far to know I’d purchased something monumentally stupid. I can still remember one of the idiotic lines the book recommended. It said to ask a woman for an aspirin because they love to mother men! I’m ashamed to know I ever paid for such drivel.
Then there was the Penthouse Forum magazine. Penthouse was a regular skin mag; the Forum was all letters and articles. The thread that ran through all Forum writing was that the “swinging” life of free sex with anyone who consents was far better than a mundane life of marriage.
To a young man with divorced parents, overactive testosterone and no real life experience this view was very tantalizing. Of course it only happened to people in movies but it seemed desirable. I remember the Forum often saying how boring it would be to wake up next to the same person every day for years.
Many years have passed since that time of mistaking immaturity and irresponsibility for wisdom. I had opportunity to engage in such a life style as Forum trumpeted. I stuck my toe in the water, so to speak, and that was enough for me to know I didn’t care for it. Not only that but the world has changed a lot since then with the advent of AIDS, other sexual diseases and more.
I have now had many years of the mundane existence that Forum so stridently told me was to be avoided at all costs. The most non-mundane thing I want to do is sky-dive. I would have done that already but my plans fell through when the job market went sour, so presently I can’t justify spending the money I was going to spend for the sky diving lessons.
In a few months it will be twenty-seven years of waking up to the same face next to me. I have yet to be bored. Sure, there have been times I’ve had those feelings. But when I think about it those feelings are directly linked to times when I was not putting as much into the marriage as I wanted to get out of it. The boredom I’ve experienced has not been so much rooted in being married as in myself.
The mundane has a lot to be said for it. Over the years I’ve known more than a few people who tried mightily to run the track laid down by Forum. Some of them are now dead. Some got off the track, recognizing its steepness and unreality. A few still run, but do so in a dispirited way that is more a sick imitation of life. They are not happy.
There is room to move around in the mundane world. You can breathe and relax there because so many people have counted it as unworthy, thus leaving more room. While they are busy dashing themselves on the rocks of empty and momentary excitement we denizens of the mundane can stroll, take our time, taste and savor.
And if we want to create a little excitement we can, since we understand the true nature of excitement, do so while understanding it is not the normal state of affairs. Not only that but we mundane bores can be excited on more sublime levels. The Forum crowd only knows states of heightened stimulation. They are not convinced of having a good time unless their senses are being blitzed on a more or less constant basis.
Sure, there are really boring people in the mundane world. But that’s what they’ve chosen. Boredom isn’t inherent in the mundane world. Here we take time to taste the wine instead of swim in it. We have great sex because we understand that the greatest stimulator is not just the body, but the intimate joining with the person that makes that body special.
And we find treasures that aren’t wrapped in shiny foil that attracts the eyes and leaves the soul famished. They are usually the best treasures of all.
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