This really is sweet! It gives one a happy song and dance feeling - child or not! I have written a great deal for children and I Love creating sweet, innocent fantasy for them. You have done this very, very well! Thank you for sharing!
I love this poem. I have a passion for writing for children and reading to children and I would definitely have a blast reading this to my own kids!!! The flow is wonderful and the story is so fun. The only critique I could come up with is that maybe "They dance and they dance Until it is morn", could be "until almost morn" since they go back to their tree until the sun comes up. I would so love to see this as a picture book!!!!
What an absolutely delightful poem! I too, like to write children's poetry.
I can imagine this as a picture book that quickly becomes a child's favorite.
Blessings,
Rebekah
This is cute! Kids will love the imaginative terms and characters.
As one who has recently investigated the possibility of writing children's verse, let me pass on a couple of things I've learned.
For some reason, kids prefer longer sentences - they seem to read easier. If you take your four-line stanzas and melt them into two, your poem will read more like a story with each line rhyming with the one preceeding. Then stanzas can be combined into paragraphs, much like traditional writing (kids have no respect for traditional format - they just want to have fun).
Perhaps there should be a hint as to the wee folk's purpose. Do they stick around to paint the leaves in the Ju Jube tree in autumn? Do they look after lost travelers in the forest? Sprinkle dew on morning flowers?
These are mere suggestions - as it stands, your poem would make an adorable picture book.
