Here I stand in this special place with my eyes closed. I can hear the sound of the violent wind as it whips around me, and the crackling of burning branches. I smell a deep dark smoke that almost makes me cough and vomit. It’s full of an almost over powering stench like burnt rubber and flesh. I feel the heat of miles and miles and years of my past that have been totally consumed behind me, blowing against my body almost knocking me over.
Raising my arms and stretching them out to my sides, as far as I can, the wind whistles as it hits my hands and is sliced into streams by my fingers. The heat is almost too overwhelming as it blows over my bald head.
I want to turn and look behind me, yet I know that the destruction of those old deep-rooted vices and strongholds of bondage would be much too devastating for me to bear. I am free from a world of evil yet, it was so much apart of me that leaving it behind is as leaving behind family. Though evil, and full of destruction, wrath, torture, and slavery, it is hard to walk away from what you have known, because it is all you have known.
Until now, I ran hard, fought hard, and lived recklessly abandoned for the Darkness of my past. I sat in fellowship with the Darkness, drank the poison of the Temptress, fight back to back with Deception against the Light. I made covenants with Death, and ran errands of mischievous destruction for many abominable masters’.
Then in my quest to conquer goodness, I ran into her. She was a small, fragile, redheaded little girl; not more than seven years of age. Freckles scattered over her milky white face like a constellation. She wore light blue overalls and pink sneakers. In the midst of my darkest pursuit of power, as I walked in thunderous black clouds and shadows, she stepped into my neighborhood; spoke a dagger of Love that struck me in my heart. And walked away, leaving me, laying on my back upon shaking grounds.
Then the truth of her words that had pierced my armor of disillusion gave birth to a fire in my soul. Convulsing in a fight to stay alive I cursed, and tried to hate. Grabbing for the Darkness I felt that I could not breathe. Suddenly I sank into the shaking ground and found myself gasping for air in an ocean of conviction; and I could not fight off my death any longer.
“Jesus I repent!” I screamed with my last drowning breath.
Now I am here, at this special place. My old life is burning behind me. The man I was is dead.
With my eyes closed tightly I slowly crouch down and dig my fingers deep into the ground. All of my past, the evils, the doubts, fears, unforgiveness, selfishness, is being consumed. He, as the Consuming Fire and His Spirit, as a Violent Force, have totally consumed my history of evil, and have turned all that is behind me into a momentum that nearly blows me off of this spot.
My heart is pounding so hard I see my chest pulsating. This fire that consumes behind me now seems to break forth in my very veins. I feel an un-restrainable desire to run.
Slowly I start to open my eyes. I am unmovable in my resolution. The fire is now alive in me. All I can do at this second is take deep breaths in and out, in and out.
Hunched over like a runner in the Olympics I feel that the time is now. My eyes come open and focus on the white line beneath me.
I am putting the past behind, and looking towards a promise. This is a new race, and new day. I am a new creation. There is no failure, no lies, no evil that can put me out. I am consumed in the Fire. I can hold back the force that compels me, no longer. I hear the in the Cunsuming Fire the masses of heaven cheering me on.