Hire
Writers
Editors
Home Tour About Read What's New Help Forums Join
My Account Login
Shop
Save
Support
E
Book
Store
Learn
About
Jesus
  

Four Ways For A Christian Writer To Win A Publishing Package HERE



The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!



 
Children PLEASE ENCOURAGE THE AUTHOR BY COMMENTING

  LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE   SEND A PRIVATE MESSAGE
  HIRE THIS WRITER
REPORT ARTICLE

 TRACK THIS AUTHOR ADD TO MY FAVORITES
corner
What's New
 
corner
 
Mysterious Car Chapter 5 Dark Moon
by Caroline Alderson
07/19/06
For Sale
Author requests article critique


  Mail
 





Fantasy: Youth ages 8 - 14



David drove Ghost Car down the road slowly. He didn't want to scare Melissa as he'd done before. He figured to take it slow and easy. Let her get used to it first.

"What's wrong, David? How come we're not flying? I want my friends to see me. Come on, let's fly."

"You want to fly? I thought you were afraid. As far as your friends seeing you, they can't. The car's invisible. The only time anyone can see the car is if Ghost Car wants them to."

"No one can see us? Well, that's all right, I want to fly anyway. Last time I wasn't expecting a car to fly, that's all. Let's go, David," Melissa urged him.

"Ok, here we go." With that they lifted up. Way up into the sky they glided. Higher and higher they climbed, until they were flying above the clouds. Abruptly, a huge computer rose in front of them, right before their very eyes. On the computer spelt Dark Moon in extra large letters. Then the words came up, 'Melissa get out of ghost car, and never have anything to do with that car again, or you'll never see what's been promised to you.' Then the huge computer disappeared as quickly as it appeared.

David's computer came on. 'Don't listen to Dark Moon, because he'll hurt you. Stay away from Dark Moon. He's trying to deceive you. He's not going to give you any clothes. He's lying to you. He just wants you in his grasp. Don't listen to him.'

Melissa didn't quite know what to believe. She thought, `It does sound pretty weird. So is flying around in an invisible car. What about the promise of clothes, by a computer program? That is strange. Having to sign my name in blood, what's that? But, Dark Moon is so intriguing. What if he really can come through? Wouldn't it be wonderful to have all those clothes? I could show off all my fancy clothes to my friends. Then they would think I'm pretty cool and want to hang around me. I'd be the most popular girl in school. Wouldn't that be neat?`

"I need to get to school now, David," Melissa insisted. She felt like Dark Moon might come through for her. She had to chance it. She just had too. She hoped David understood. She knew Ghost Car was pretty special to him. 'But, he has to understand that Dark Moon is special to me,' she thought as she watched the ground slowing coming up to them. The car softly touched the ground.

As she opened the door and was going to get out, David tried one more time. "Melissa, I hope you change your mind. Please think about it, ok?"

"We'll see, David," Melissa told him, not very convincing. She had other plans in mind.

"Oh, David," She spun around. "What do you do with the car when you drive it to school" she asked curiously?

"It takes off on it's own."

"Oh, ok." She turned and ran off to school.

David and Tommy always eat lunch together. David was about to ask Tommy something when Larry the school bully walked up to their table with an odd expression on his face. And of course, he has two of his buddies with him. It seemed to David that Larry never goes anywhere without at least two of his buddies tagging along with him. He probably has so many enemies he's afraid to go anywhere alone for fear someone would come along and start trouble. So, he always takes his bodyguards with him, wherever he goes. David was thinking this, as he saw Larry walking up.

"What do you want?" David asked, slightly concerned. He had been warned about Larry on the first day of school. Brad had told him to watch out for Larry the school bully. He had said Larry likes to cause trouble for new kids. So David was always aware that Larry could approach him at any time, and cause him trouble. He wondered why Larry never did bother him, seeing as how David had been going to that school for a little over a month. He wondered what Larry wanted at this time. Well, he guessed he'd soon find out. He waited for Larry to answer him.

Larry hesitated, and then spoke. "I want to know where you stole that invisible car? Don't try to deny it, because I saw you and Tommy flying around in it. How come it's invisible, and how can it fly?"

David and Tommy looked at each other, shocked. `No one was supposed to be able to see Ghost Car. How is it that Larry, of all people, could see it? Who else can see it? Why didn't Ghost Car tell him about someone else being able to see it? He couldn't believe it; it was so weird.`

Larry was getting impatient. "Well, come on, answer me." He had his hands on his hips; his face showed that he was being demanding.

David looked at Tommy with a questioning expression on his face. "I don't know what you're talking about, Larry. I don't think I've ever heard of an invisible car, much less a car that flies. That's a really interesting story Larry. Why were you asking? Are you trying to cause some kind of trouble?” David looked at Tommy, “Do you know what he's talking about Tommy?"

"No, not me." Tommy took a bite of his lunch, and then looked at Larry.

Larry didn't look like he believed what they were saying. "Yeah right, don't tell me that! I told you, I saw both of you in that car. I'm going to beat the thunder out of you David, if you don't tell me about that car! You got it?" With that, he balled up his fists, and acted as though he might hit David at any moment.

At that time the bell rang, proclaiming lunch had ended. With relief, David told Larry, "Have to get back to class. See you later." David waved, as he and Tommy hurried off.

"Count on it, David! This isn't over by any means!" Larry angrily let him know. He was very aggravated at that bell for ringing and spoiling all his fun. Larry wanted to fight David, or at the very least, make him tell him about that car that he saw flying around. He just knew he could get David to talk. He sulked as he went to his next class. He anticipated when he could confront David again. In his mind, he started planning what he could do to David to get him to cooperate with him and tell him what he wanted to know. He has to get his hands on that car. He has to. It would be so much fun going around scaring people with an invisible car that flies. He could act like he was going to run over them, and then pull up at the last minute. Larry laughed as he thought about the control he would have over his classmates. He wouldn't hurt anyone just scare them a little. Then everyone would want to be friends with him. It would be fine!

David went on to his class. He sat next to Tod in history. Today they were studying about the Civil War. David leaned over to Tod. "Tod, I need to talk to you later; it's very important."

Tod fiddled with his pen, thinking. "I don't know, it's not about Dark Moon, is it? Cause if it is, I don't want to hear about it."

David thought, 'hum, now what? What do I tell him I want to talk to him about? I need to talk to him about Dark Moon, urgently.' The thought came to him, 'tell Tod about Ghost Car.' 'Ghost Car. Where did that thought come from? Maybe Ghost Car wants me to tell Tod about him. Ok, here goes.' "No, it's not about Dark Moon. Actually, it's something better."

"Something better than Dark Moon? Right. I doubt it. Nothings better than Dark Moon. Nothing."

"You want to bet?" David enticed him. "I have something I want to show you, but,” David looked around all secretive like, and whispered, “you can't tell anyone about it. It's a secret." He said this to get him interested.

"A secret? Sounds intriguing." Tod’s eyes grew big, and he looked genuinely drawn. "Can we get together after school today, Tod?" David hopefully asked.

"Yes, ok, I guess. I'll see you after school."

David didn't think school would ever end, but it finally ended, and the school bell rang. He ran to his locker to put up his schoolbooks, and then went out the side door. Tod hadn't made it there yet. David hoped he wouldn't change his mind and not come. While he waited, he thought about what he would say to Tod when he arrived.

About five minutes later, Tod finally arrived. "Sorry, Melissa stopped me in the hall, so I had to talk to her. What did you want to talk to me about? What was that you were telling me about showing me something secret?"

"Yes, I wanted to tell you about my invisible car," David started.

"Wait a minute, I heard Larry asking you about some invisible car that flies. But you said nothing like that existed. What was that all about?"

"I do have an invisible car." 'Uh oh', he thought. 'Tod also signed a contract with Dark Moon, saying he wouldn't have anything to do with Ghost Car. So I will have to be extremely careful that I never say my car's name.'

"I'd like to see your invisible car, David. Where is it?" Tod began glancing around, looking for it.

Ghost Car came rolling up to David. "Right here; don't you see it, Tod?"

"No. See what? I can't see anything. Come on David, where is it?" Tod had a blank look on his face like he thought David was making the whole thing up.

"The car's right here, right beside me. You can't see it?"

"No."

"I guess you're not supposed to see it," David reasoned to Tod.

Tod was starting to get angry. "Hey, that's not fair! You said you'd show your invisible car to me. So show me! Maybe you lied. Maybe there's no such thing. I think you made the whole thing up. Wait till this gets around, that your' making up false stories about having an invisible car that flies! What will your friends think of you then, huh? Ha, you won't have any friends! " With that, Tod unlocked his bike, jumped on it, and rode off down the street.

~~~~~~~~~


The room is dark and smoky, and smells like soot out of a dirty fireplace. There are creatures there that are not human. They're from the dark world: Dark Moons world. Dark Moon is at the front of the room. It looks like a meeting. The creatures look like various monsters, all different sizes and shapes. The ugly egg is at the front with Dark Moon. He looks scared. Dark Moon turns to him and barks out an order, "Report, Zetta."

The ugly, black and blue bruised egg cringes at Dark Moon's tone of voice. "Uh, Boss, I'm working on Melissa, and Tod. Tod is easy, but . . . "

"But what?" Dark Moon shouted, scaring the egg so bad he flipped over three times in absolute terror.
Shaking so badly he can hardly talk, he tells him, "Uh, Your Unholiness, you see… it's Ghost Car . . . " Zetta was wringing his hands, a worried look crossing his face.

"Gross! Never say His name in my presence. You know how I hate that car. He does nothing but cause trouble for my kingdom and me. He messed me up just because I decided I deserved to be as powerful a car as him. Some of the other cars agreed with me. Actually, one third of them followed me. I should have been the leader, not Ghost Car. Huh! We demanded that Ghost Car make me equal to Him. I wanted to have the same power that He has. I figured I would be a better leader of the kingdom of Light than Ghost Car. But no. Do you believe it? He got mad and threw all of us out, except the other two thirds that didn't give Him any trouble. Worse than that, He said He was going to make us look just like we felt in our hearts toward Him. So He made us all monsters, because that's how we are in our hearts. So what? Of course, that's how we are in our hearts. Isn't that how we are supposed to be? Ha, a, ha, ha, hissss." Dark Moon glared down upon Zetta. "Continue with your report."

Zetta continued "That car is friends with Melissa's brother, David. He's trying to help David rescue Melissa from us. I don't know how long we can keep her interested in the Dark Moon program, tempting her with our nice clothes scam. She's already taken an interest in Ghost Car… uh, sorry boss." He ducked, like he thought Dark Moon might smack him at any minute. "She's been seen riding around and flying in Ghost . . . I mean that car." Then he waited. He knew his boss would not be pleased with him, and how he'd been handling Melissa. He knew he should have been more aggressive with her.

"You have to get her, Zetta. I don't care what it takes, but influence her toward darkness. If you don't do this for me, and do it correctly, I'll demote you. Is that clear, Zetta?"

~~~~~~~~

Melissa had been told about all the clothes she would be receiving, and she was beginning to wonder if she was being deceived. Something didn't feel right about the whole situation. It felt like . . . well, like maybe it wasn't real. She felt like a dark, smoke filled, cloudy atmosphere dominated her surroundings. She saw herself trying to climb up out of all the ickiness, but unable to succeed, she fell back into the midst of it. Then she rose and started the process all over again, with the same results happening.

Over and over, she attempted to get out of the pit she dug for herself. Admitting what was happening to her was one thing, verbalizing it was another. She kept slipping back in, with no understanding of how to achieve victory over the struggle she found herself involved in. She knew she had to find help, but didn't know where to start looking for it. Who could she talk to? Who would even understand what she was going through?

No one would understand what she had done, her signing her name in blood. Who would do such a stupid thing? She couldn't imagine anyone else being so greedy they would actually sign their life away in blood just to receive a bunch of silly clothes. Nobody would do that, that is, no one but her.

Then, she remembered Ghost Car, and a tiny, ever so tiny peace tried to come into her being. She thought about her ride with David in that magical, flying, invisible, wonderful car, and more peace tried to descend upon her. And then a ray of hope crept in.

~~~~~~~

David got in his car, still thinking about Tod. As he traveled down the road, he glanced in his rear view mirror. He felt like someone was following him. A long, sleek, black car trailed a short distance behind him. David turned, yet the car still followed. `Wait a minute; no one is supposed to be able to see me. The car's invisible. What's going on?` As he thought about it, he tried turning again, but the black car persisted in following him.

'Well, no problem. I know what I'll do; he can't fly. Let's try that." Ghost Car slowly lifted off the ground. The car kept coming.

It tried to follow on the street, so David flew over the school, putting him two streets over. Then, he looked behind him. "Oh, No!" The car still pursued him, but with one exception. The car flew!

~to be continued~
5 of 8
copyright © 2000 Caroline Alderson















If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be! TRUST JESUS NOW

Read more articles by Caroline Alderson or search for articles on the same topic or others.


Read More - Free Reprints, Main Site Articles, Most Read Articles or highly acclaimed Challenge Articles. Read Great New Release Christian Books for FREE in our Free Reads for Reviews Program. Christian writers can JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and help spread the Gospel.


The opinions expressed by authors do not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.

Hire a Christian Writer, Christian Writer Wanted, Christian Writer Needed, Christian Content Needed
Find a Christian Editor, Hire a Christian Editor, Christian Editor, Find a Christian Writer
 
corner
Corner
This article has been read 645 times     < Previous | Next >


Member Comments
Member Date




TRUST JESUS TODAY














Free Audio Bible
500 Plus Languages
Faith Comes By Hearing.com