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by denise watson-smith
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A few days ago, I had a discussion with a friend of mine. We were speaking about marriages and church. We were discussing how your home is your first ministry. It is very difficult to have a strong marriage, when spouses are unevenly yoked. It is very difficult to have a strong marriage, where he is at one place and she is another. The job of the enemy is to cause division within the home, and divided worship is division. When you began to worship separately, you begin to divide the family. If we can divide the worship on Sunday, we can also divide it during the week within our homes. God called the man to to be the head of the home, an that being said, we should follow our spouses, if our spouses are following God. I can not think of one instance in the Bible where it tells families to worship in separate locations. There is a saying that the family that prays together stays together, so if that is true, what happens when you stop praying together, what happens when you stop worshipping together, what do you do when you ďministryĒ falls apart, because you are divided. There are a lot of impending divorces because he worshipped at church a, and she worshipped at church b. Marriages are being destroyed because he believes this and she believes that. We need to understand that our first ministry is to our family. We are under obligation by God to respect the ministry of family. God designed marriages, God designed family. The bible tells us women to submit ourselves to our husbands and for our husbands to submit themselves to God. You can not be in submission to your mate if you are trying to lead your mate, especially if your husband is a man of God, desiring to do the will of God. Many women today want their husbands to join the church of ďtheirĒ choice as opposed to trusting God speaking to her husband to have them (the family) go to the church where God is calling them to be. The husband is the priest of the home, and he has to be in a position where he can lead his family, and he has to be where God is feeding him, so that he may feed his family. We women would rather decide for our husbands than have God lead our husbands. And then when God does not lead our husbands to the place where we as women decide that they should go, we let our husbands go there, and we go someplace else, and then we have division. God has been dealing with me so strongly and He constantly reminds me that no matter what, my home is my first ministry.

My Pastor at my home church always would say, ďDonít outrun your interference.Ē I use to wonder what that meant, but as I continue to grow, I am beginning to understand. For starters, do not go before God in any part of your life. Donít try to get God to follow you, you must follow God. Second of all, as a married woman, donít try to go before your husband. He is your covering and your protection. He is the priest of the home, the head. If the head is under submission to God, then everything else shall be too. Donít outrun your covering. When you begin to outrun your covering, then you begin to expose yourself. If your covering says that God says go right, then go right, donít go left because you donít believe that God communicates with your spouse. Just as God speaks to you, He speaks to him too. There may be a time you are in a place where you have no desire to be because God spoke to your spouse. But if you trust God, and you believe that Godís word is true, then you must understand that obedience is better than sacrifice, and being under submission to the priest of the home is an act of being obedient to God. Believe me, I understand this all too well. For years, I have tried hard to be the head, even though my husband is a God-fearing man, I thought that God only spoke to me. When we moved to a new city a few years ago, we went to a local church there. First of all, I did not want to move, because I had to leave everything behind, and second of all, I did not want to leave my home church. On the day we visited that church, I was very distant and cold, but my husband loved it. During the visitors, my husband had us stand and he did the introduction of the family and during that introduction, he informed the church body that God had laid it on his heart that we should join that church. At that instant, I looked at him and told him that he was lying because did not tell me that. We did join that church, and it was extremely hard for me, but as the years have come and gone, God has been showing me because of my act of obedience (finally), that He is showering me with blessings, because for the first time, I have decided not to act out in rebellion, but to embrace who I am in Christ and who my husband is in the Lord. The thing was, I had to put things into the proper perspective and realize that no matter how strong I am, my husband is my covering, and because my husband follows God, then I too shall be in submission to Godís word in my marriage and my home because it is true, your family is your first ministry. The bible tells us to train a child in the way it should go and when they are old they will not depart from it, the best way to train a child is to lead by example, and to lead by example means to show them that you are willing to follow Godís guidance and directions for your home, your family, your marriage, ďBecause a family that prays together, stays together.Ē Be blessed.

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Member Comments
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esther robinson 18 Apr 2006
Simply superb. Being of one mindedness is essential for a happy married life. Surely it is in the hands of a woman to make her home a heaven or hell by submitting to the heavenly Father.


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