”She opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness. She watches over the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: ‘Many daughters have done well, but you excel them all.’ Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised. Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her own works praise her in the gates.” (Proverbs 31:26-31)
In this passage we can see the instruction for a woman’s words, a woman’s work, and the result of both when done for the Lord.
A woman’s words should be full of wisdom and kindness. When we are looking to God, through Christ, by the Spirit our tongues can be instruments of righteousness.
Are you known for your warm, encouraging words?
Do other women seek out your wisdom?
What would your family say?
Would they agree with verses 28 and 29?
Take some time to answer each of these questions with thought and prayer. If God is directing you to make a change, answer Him in obedience.
Don’t ever put God off. It is dangerous to hear the truth and walk away unwilling to change. “But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves,” (James 1:22). We know it is Him who wins in the end. Don’t we want to be on the winning team?
Get to the root of the problem. What causes your words to be unkind or unwise? There could be several reasons. Prayerfully consider what fuels your words.
Do you carelessly blurt out embarrassing statements?
Do you go for the throat with your cutting sarcasm?
What are you feeling when this happens?
Do your statements make you feel better?
Dig deeper and remove the root. Ask God to open your heart and mind to His word. Read Ephesians 4:17-32. Notice verses 29-32, “Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.”
What is God saying here?
What should be done first before we can speak what is good and necessary for edification?
Digging out all of the sinful motives of our speech is the first step. Then we can call upon our loving God to fill us with His Holy Spirit. The Spirit brings the love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control that we need to live as an example of Christ. (Gal. 5:22-23) Allowing the Spirit to take control of our hearts will also give Him control of our tongues bringing glory to God through our obedience.