I could feel the heat of it on my back. The fierce fiery line of separation that I had just ignited now divided our bed in two. I hugged my pillow closer and tried to take a deep breath. Thoughts of things said through out the day filled my mind. The intensity had been building. Now the big finale!! What should I do?
"What do you mean, what should YOU do? He is the one who is being unreasonable!!" says a familiar voice, "Just give him the silent treatment. Make him pay!!" For years I had listened to this voice. For years I had obeyed my feelings and have been miserable and tormented as a result. That night was different. As much as I wanted to harden my heart against my beloved, there was a softness in my heart that would not harden. A place inside me that remembered why I could even love in the first place. Because my Father loved me first. He saw all the sinfulness in me and though I have hurt Him countless times, His love for me is unconditional. How could I receive this love from my Father and deny my husband the healing comfort of His love through me?
What's that I hear? The deep breathing of my husband's sleep. Is it too late, Lord? Do I have to leave it till morning now? Will I ever fall asleep? Suddenly, he moved and I knew this was my chance.
"Honey, I'm sorry." I said quietly.
"It's okay" he muttered.
Peace flooded over me. The taste of humility and obedience is so sweet.
Thank you God for the grace and humility to be able to admit when I am wrong, and for the unconditional love I receive from you in abundance. Continue to allow me share it with others.
If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be! TRUST JESUS NOW
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