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FAITHWRITERS CLASSICS Newbie Bored
by David Ian
02/28/06
For Sale
Author requests article critique


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(Yes, David wrote ALL the parts below on the FW Message Boards for "Giddy Friday" fun)

Newbie Bored


David_Ian : Hi everyone, my name is David_Ian and I'm new

Woodnote: No you're not!

FirstActs: Don't let him fool you, newbies. He's just pretending to be new.

David_Ian: I wrote a new piece, and I'd like a critique...

DebPorter: (sigh) Is this the same "new piece" you wrote last month?

MCriss: And the month before?

David_Ian: Well, yes, but that doesn't change the fact that I wrote it all new again this morning.

FirstActs: Can we break for snacks again?

Jacky: Uh, are you guys always like this?

DebPorter: Oh, no. Usually we're much worse.

Woodnote: I wrote an "Ode to Peas". Wanna hear? It's titled "A World Without Peas"

FirstActs: (or "Visualize Whirled Peas")

Woodnote: Who said that?

David_Ian: Has anybody seen my Emotikon? I cannot speak without an Emotikon!

Whitney: So, does any REAL writing get done around here?

MCriss: You’d be surprised. The last Weekly Contest Winner was copied off the side of a cereal box.

FirstActs: It was an Avante Garde piece, thank you very much. Very artsy.

MCriss: It was a list of ingredients, you hack! “Milled yellow corn?” “BHT added as a preservative?”

FirstActs: A vicious comment on the human condition

Woodnote: Doesn’t anybody want to hear my “Ode to Peas”?

DebPorter: But you have to admit, the last stanza was pretty profound.

MCriss: Yeah, I gotta give you that.

FirstActs: Thank you, Deb.

Woodnote: Here goes! “Ode to Peas” by Woodnote!

Purpose: What was his last stanza?

David_Ian: Found my Emotikon!

Woodnote: “Peas, pretty peas, pretty please…”

Deb: “Some settling of contents may occur during shipping and handling.”

FirstActs: Pure poetry!

Woodnote: “Peas to appease…”

David_Ian: Now, where were we?

Whitney: Nice meeting you all…

Jacky: Yeah, we’ll just be moving on, now…

Purpose: Let’s check out the “Water Cooler”. Maybe they’re a little saner there….


Hee hee!

David Ian


If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be! TRUST JESUS NOW

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Member Comments
Member Date
Amy Michelle Wiley  02 Aug 2006
Haha! Found this when I was browsing the FW site. Glad you saved it, hehehehe. Are you gonna do another one?
Pat Guy  01 Mar 2006
Oh David! It was nice to see some names of old friends! What a hoot! (as always)
Christian Coutts 28 Feb 2006
Thank you for the laugh, brother. Perfect time, God is awesome. God bless you.




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