In our final part of this series, we will discuss tearing down the walls of backbiting. I would like to begin by further examining P. Bunny Wilson’s theory about betrayal having a baby and propose that there are in fact two babies, twins if you will: bitterness and backbiting. Often times our bitterness leads to backbiting.
Proverbs 25:23 says “The north wind brings forth rain, and a backbiting tongue an angry countenance.” When I think of backbiting I believe it is in line with gossip but with more of a sting—more vindictiveness. Now that’s not to say that gossip can’t be vindictive—but the scripture says that backbiting brings forth an angry countenance. So the person doing the backbiting is purposely, maliciously, angrily speaking ill against another. This denotes that something is happening inwardly which affects the outward appearance. So, if one is in the habit of being a backbiter they are most likely an angry person. The anger lies within them for whatever reason and as a result they become backbiters—always having a negative word to say about someone, always willing to tear someone down at every chance. They don’t like you because you smile too much, you’re too happy, you know too much—whatever—there is always something that sets them off and gives them a reason to crucify with their tongue. Many times these individuals have experienced betrayal and bitterness and their response (because they have not sought healing from God) is to engage in backbiting. These individuals are lying in wait for the opportunity to accuse you to others. Their words are malicious and hurtful and they look for others that will agree with them or listen to their slander.
Are we like that? I know, you will say no—but do you entertain it? Do you partake in his behavior by listening to it? When someone approaches you with vile information about another—do you sit and listen? Not only that, do you share that information with someone else after you’ve heard it? Here are some scriptures we need to meditate on concerning our tongue: Prov. 11:13; 16:28; 18:6; 26:20) and the consequences: Psa. 101:5; Prov. 8:13; 17:9; Matt. 12:36, 37; I Tim 5:13.
Remember the next time you have a temptation to slander someone or are in the presence of someone else who is doing it—that backbiting is a tool of Satan to divide us from one another. A sign of Christian maturity is the ability to hold your tongue and speak in love and kindness toward one another and about one another—EVEN WHEN YOU”VE BEEN WRONGED!!!!!
If your backbiting is a result of your betrayal and your bitterness, you need to go before God confessing and asking forgiveness and healing.
Are we building walls of betrayal, bitterness and backbiting to protect us from those who have hurt us? Are we assisting others in building their walls because we are the ones doing the hurting? Do these walls exist in our lives so much so that we cannot see those whom God has placed in our paths to love? Can we not love each other and minister to each other because of these walls?
I pray that you have been blessed by this series and that you will take a serious look at your relationship with God and others and if there be walls in your life that are preventing you from being all that God has for you to be—that you earnestly, faithfully and seriously seek to tear them down!