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by kevin ewing
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First, I would like to thank God for the word of wisdom and knowledge, also for understanding. It was only because of Him I can share with you what He has given me.
It was about two years ago that the Lord spoke to me concerning this topic. I must admit that before God gave me this revelation on the perfect mate, everything I thought was right in a relationship was totally wrong. Before I precede any further I would like to make it abundantly clear that no human being is perfect. Therefore, there is no perfect mate, in the sense that both parties are faultless and therefore will have a faultless relationship. However, perfect in the sense that the Almighty God, who is aware and knows all things has already chosen or prepared a mate for you before the foundation of the world. Isaiah 46:10 declares that God knows the end of a situation from its beginning. So therefore, I think it is wise to assume that God knows the end of your life before it even began. As a result, He has already chosen someone specifically for you.
Many times throughout life we think and feel that we can do or make decisions without consulting God. We as human beings feel that we know what is best for us. However, the Bible is very much clear concerning this situation. Proverbs 16:25 states that there is a way unto man that may seem or appear to be right, however at the end of that man’s way it is death and destruction. On the other hand, Proverbs 19:21 says that there are many devices or ideas in a man’s heart but only the counsel of God will stand. So from both scriptures we can conclude that it would be in our best interest to consult God, whom is all knowing.
God has made it very clear to me that he and only he can give us the perfect mate, Proverbs 19:14. God realized that from the beginning in the Garden of Eden, it was not good for man to be alone, Genesis 2:18. This was the only thing in His creation that He said was not good. So in Ephesians 1:3, he said that He has blessed us with all spiritual blessing in heavenly places, which also includes our mates.
Now I know the question that is standing out in your head right now is how? How would you know who is the perfect mate for you? Well you must believe that according to God’s Word He has predestined someone for you to be with you until death do you part. In the book of Matthew 6, God told His disciples that they should not be like the Gentiles asking for this and that, He said that your heavenly Father already knows what you have need for. In Philippians 4:19, God said that He would supply your needs according to His riches and glory in Christ Jesus.
God has revealed to me that the secret to success is so simple, and all it is, is to follow and obey Him. Matthew 6:33 states that we must seek the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all other things will be added unto us. You must understand that the world’s way of doing things is to run after stuff, but God’s way is you seek after Him and He will make those things come to you. Now doesn’t that sound easier?
You must understand that you cannot find the perfect mate or that predestined mate that God has selected for you on your own. It requires the assistance and direction of God. Isaiah 37:25 states that a good man’s steps are ordered by the Lord and God himself delights or takes joy in this man’s way.
There is so much good that comes out of the perfect relationship. Firstly, God blesses the union, and the favour of God is continually upon it, Proverbs 18:22 says “He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favour from the Lord.”
Many times when I attend weddings I would always hear the preacher or pastor say to the couple “whom God has put together let no man put asunder.” Now do you believe that every wedding that you attended and those words were spoken God really put these relationships together? Did He really predestine that union, or was it a man ordained thing and God now being attached to it. Folks I submit to you that many people are married to the wrong persons. They are trying to make something happen that God the Father had not ordained. So that marriage or relationship could and would only bring frustration. We must understand that frustration only comes about when one’s expectation has not been met by someone whom they expected something from.
God in His awesome wisdom has placed particular emotions, desires and dreams in you or expectations, which He at the same time has created someone to fulfil. Remember what the Word of God said in Proverbs 19:21, it says that only His counsel will stand, only the things that He has place in you as far as your mate is concerned shall last. That is if we only wait on Him and allow His will to be performed. God promised that He will honour us when we wait on Him, Proverbs 27:18 states that a servant that waits on His master shall be honoured.
There are many reasons why God’s choice for us is not only always right, but perfect. Do you remember the story about King David, when God had rejected Saul and sent Samuel to anoint David from the house of Jesse? Now in Samuel’s eyes David did not fit the image of a king. This is a perfect example of where we go wrong. Lets take a look at what God said to Samuel, 1 Samuel 16:7 says “But the Lord said unto Samuel, look not on his countenance or on his height of stature because I have refused him (Saul), for the Lord seeth not as man seeth, for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” So as you can see God knows what is best for us because He is looking at the heart, while we are so consumed by beauty and material goods. The Word of God also states that God wants the best for us always, He said Jeremiah 29:11 “For I (God) know the thoughts that I think towards you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil to give you and expected end. You see the Bible states the heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked who can know it, Jeremiah 17:9. However, in the 10th verse of Jeremiah 17, God states that only He can search the heart, and He will give every man according to His ways and according to the fruit of His doing.
I know that there may be many of you reading this right now and saying, Lord when will my time come, when will God give me my perfect mate? Well what I would like to mention here is simply this, do you think it would be fair for God to groom and prepare a person for you, someone who has obeyed God and followed His instructions, and bless you with that person. Keeping in mind that you refuse to conform to God’s will and the way He intends you to live. This will not work because you are not equally yoked. Remember God is a just God and according to Jeremiah 17:10 he will give every man according to His way, and according to the fruit of his doings. I would like to put emphasis on the fact that God will not bless your mess. You see when you ask God to bless something He did not ordain for you, what you are saying is that your plan for your relationship or life is better that His. Another mistake that we so often make is praying and asking God for people that He did not ordain for us. For example our prayer would be something like this. Lord I want a handsome or pretty woman, tall dark and handsome etc. Do you know that you could be praying against God’s will? I have heard may people make the statement you need to tell God what you want. Now this may be true to a certain extent. However, lets look at it this way. What if God has person A for you but you are praying for person B, you see even though God has person A for you He must give you person B. Reason being, He cannot go against His Word. His word sys in Mark 11:24 “What soever things ye desire when ye pray believe that you have receive it and you shall have it.” At the same time person B could and would never meet up to God’s person A. Remember God knows the heart and it is His intent to satisfy or fulfil your hearts desire. Here is how you know if something is of God, yourself or Satan. Proverbs 10:22 says, “The blessings of the Lord it maketh rich, and He added no sorrow with it.” All this is saying is that when God gives you something, that thing or person should add or bring increase to your life because God said He adds no sorrow to your blessing.
Now you might say, but every relationship has some degree of problems or sorrows, and you are right, however, there is a major difference between the perfect mate and what you desire. That difference is, with the perfect relationship, either one or both parties in the midst of problems are always looking for a compromise. This acts as a way to end the hurt, sorrow, pain, or problem so that they can get back to loving one another. The perfect relationship is filled with Godly character. You begin to demonstrate God’s love and sometimes do not even know it. Therefore the perfect relationship exercises the God kind of love as in 1 Corinthians13:4-7, and one of them is that love seeks not here own. This means that in the perfect relationship love does not seek its own benefits but is always in the pursuit of its partner and their partner’s well being, this is compromising. Unlike the relationship that was not ordained by God, no one wants to be wrong. There is never real peace, and true joy, again because they are trying to make something happen that God did not ordain. As a result, there will never be true or real peace.
I think one of the greatest things in the perfect relationship is that everything that happens in that relationship be it good or bad, it all is working for the good of that relationship. Think of the worst thing, and even that thing will produce good at the end of it, Romans 8:28 says “And we know that all things work together for the good to them that love God to them who are called according to His purpose.
In conclusion, I would like to sum everything up by quoting Ecclesiastes 3:1, and it says to everything there is a season and a time to every purpose under the heaven, and this includes your perfect mate. However, the catch is it does not happen in your time because you did not ordain it; it will only be done in God’s time. The Bible states according to Ecclesiastes 3:11 that God makes everything beautiful in His time, and He set the Word in our hearts so that no man can find out the work that God made from the beginning to the end.

By: Kevin L.A Ewing

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