Journal Entry #1 - I’m so excited about the future. My two children are well on their way. Good boys, polite, both have asked Jesus into their hearts. My youngest is about to begin grade 1, full days in school. I can take a little time for me in life. Devote some time to my interests. Develop my part-time personal training business, I have so many ideas bouncing around in my head for my clients, I can hardly wait to get started.
Journal Entry #2 - I was so tired today. I have been working hard this week getting ready for our garage sale, I’ll just put it down to that. I shut the garage sale down at 1:30 today. I was just so tired, I couldn’t sit out there any longer. Oh well, a good day all in all, we got rid of a lot of baby things today, it’s nice to see the back of that stuff.
Journal Entry #3 - I think I’m pregnant! I am so done having my family. It just can’t be. Another baby would be devastating. Life will be over as I know it. I just can’t do this again, God wouldn’t let this happen. It just can’t be.
I was devastated. The day my third son was to arrive, the tears were flowing. Reality had set in that the next time I came home, I would be bringing home with me a crying baby, a little being that would require me to do everything for him. Our love child was about three years old before I got somewhat used to the reality of having him around. You see my husband and I decided that once the children started coming, I would be a stay at home mom, which I was happy to do, however that was sixteen years ago. I thought that by this stage/age I would be doing a few more things for me. However, God tells us in 1Thes 5(16) to be joyful always, pray continually and give thanks in all circumstances, for this is Gods will for you in Christ Jesus. Being joyful and connecting with God in prayer was very difficult for me as the first three years of Jeremy’s life I struggled almost daily BUT I am aware that God is in control and as Jerimiah 29(11) states, For I know the plans I have for you, plans not to harm but to give you hope and a future. What a comforting verse to cling to when your plans don’t reach their fruition.
There were days when I was so exhausted from weeks of not sleeping through the night I felt like those actors in the movie, The Night of the Living Dead, there were days that I just made dinner and played with my son and there were days when the entrepreneur came out in me and ideas began to flow in regard to different ways I could glorify our God. I kept plugging away, doing all the things God placed on my heart and in my head. For you see, I had thrown up my hands and thrown away MY plans and humbled myself to the Lord and said, “ o.k. Lord, Jeremy is your child, he was certainly not in our plan , so this is obviously where you want me, direct me and give me joy in all that I do, whether I like what You have assigned me to do or not.
My children are now sixteen, eleven and four. These ages are a little less demanding and I have been able to begin a christian coaching business using my expertise in marriage, fitness and nutrition. I have always had the desire to write and I have written bible studies, a Fitness & Nutrition manual and I have the privlege of sharing my life experiences with folks like you.
I had been looking for personal satisfaction. I had been wanting to find something that would make me feel as thought I was serving an important purpose in this world. God has shown me once again that He has given me life, I need to live my life for Him. Every time I do, I find satisfaction and I am a woman with purpose. We are here to glorify God and we can do that by sharing with others the blessings He has so graciously given each one of us. I will do my best to show God my appreciation for my family by loving them and for my gifts and talents by using them.
Having another child was one of the worst things I thought could happen to me. It turns out, it is one of the best. If anyone would have told me a few short years ago that I would have my own website, articles published and leading bible studies, I would have said, “never in a million year.”
My short sightedness had me teaching women to exercise. Gods bigger plan has me raising three beautiful boys, enjoying twenty years of marriage and most importantly, teaching others about His glorious self. Thank you Lord for being the driver of my life. This is who I want in control of my life. How about you?
If you want to find out more about me please visit my website at http://www.yakattack.myeweb.net/ or e-mail me at Ryakattack@aol.com
I encourage you to truly let God direct your life, whether you like the direction or not. It’s almost a selfish act really, because you WILL be blessed with true joy and true contentment in the Lord.
... And His commends are not burdensome, for everyone born of God overcomes the world.
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