When I look back and think about all Iíve gone through,
I realize that Godís word is true
When it says that thereís a purpose for all things in life,
Even the failures, disappointment, misery and strife.
I can clearly see Godís purpose opening up in me,
And how everything and everyone are making me as I should be.
Just take a moment to go with me down memory lane
So that youíll know that Iím not going completely insane
When I praise God for the good and the bad,
And I praise Him when Iím happy and when Iím sad.
Growing up, I was the youngest and the only girl,
And, I spent most of my time living in my own little world
Feeling alienated, and sometimes lost and alone,
Consumed with the thought that I had no place to call my own.
Had God not allowed me to feel that loneliness and alienation,
I wouldnít have the desire and determination
To assure that other children donít have that burden to bear;
For, Godís purpose in my life is to let them know that He does care.
I always struggled with obesity in the younger years,
And the horrible way I was treated brought me to tears;
But, had not God allowed me to experience that persecution,
I wouldnít be able to teach others that Godís love is the solution
To accepting, loving and appreciating who and what you are in life,
Never allowing what others think or say to cause you heartache, misery and strife.
As a teenager, I fell in love with someone who wasnít in love with me,
But, that was Godís plan, the very way it was supposed to be;
For, if I had not endured the pain that he put me through,
I would not be able to witness and testify to you,
And let other young girls know that love is found within yourself,
And, you shouldnít depend on receiving it from anyone else.
No one can love you as God can and will in every way;
Therefore, itís best not to give yourself away
Hoping to gain love, approval and acceptance;
But, learn to stand on your own independence
Until God sends the man who can help you,
And will faithfully stand by you in all that you go through.
Had God not allowed that man to turn his back on me and that child,
Never looking back to give us so much as a sympathetic smile,
I would not know the pain of being emotionally misused and abused;
For, it taught me how to not allow my self-confidence to be bruised.
Neither would I have learned how to stand on my own
And I learned to never look down on those who do me wrong;
For, it all has a purpose in our eternal destiny;
Therefore, count it all joy and receive the victory.
Had God not allowed me to spend time in jail,
I wouldnít have enough compassion to keep others avoid living that hell.
Had God not allowed me to lose nearly everything that I own,
I couldnít have learned that when Iím weak, Heís yet strong.
Had God not allowed me to feel pain through deception as a wife,
I could not help other women avoid that pain and strife.
Had God not allowed me to feel the pain of unfaithfulness,
I wouldnít have come to the reality that I must confess
For placing people and things before Him;
For, by my own unfaithfulness, I was condemned.
Had God not allowed me to fail on so many occasions,
I could not encourage others to get up and try again without hesitation
When they fall short along the way;
For, a new opportunity arises with every new day.
Had God not allowed the enemy to tear my life apart,
I wouldnít have a strong fear of Godís power within my heart.
Black sheep, ugly duckling, odd ball,
Iíve been called it all;
But, it was all purposely done
So that God could turn me into the beautiful swan;
For, sin created a lot of ugly within me,
But, because of Godís purpose, I am now ugly-free.
Had God not allowed me to suffer all that Iíve been through,
I could not be a living testimony to you;
Therefore, it all plays a purpose in my eternal destiny;
For, in the end, I will gain eternal victory.
All of the heartache and grief that Iíve been given
Was all spiritually designed and purposely driven.
Earthly torment purposely drove me into salvation
So that I may escape the torment of eternal damnation.