Married Couples of Wisdom
by Carol Barnesel
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Married couples have it all, over unmarried couples....or do we?
We have someone to call our own, someone to share and care
for, someone to talk our concerns with, someone to give to and to receive from. Someone to love and be loved by. But when the newness of the married relationship wares off, what do we have? If the partnership wasn't founded by the oracles of God, what's there to share? If a man or women, doesn't first learn how to love God, how can they love one another? when the husband doesn't show that attention or affection as often or perhaps not at all anymore, and the wife stops respecting the husband, what does a married couple have over an unmarried couple?
NOTHING.....,except, a piece of paper that says, this man and woman have been joined together in Holy matrimony, but other than that there's nothing to hold on to. If ... the children are all grown and have left to pursue their own life's' interest, all a married women has left are the memories of what use to be, mainly because she has given her life's' time to raising her children and seeing to her husbands needs, she oftentimes have left her own dreams behind.
The pleasure pains of being a maid and cook for her use to be lover, can get a little boring. By the same token working day in and day out for a fussy and complaining woman can be equally as boring. Their passion has gone or is lying dormant, the two of them seem to have nothing in common anymore except to argue constantly with one another. That has been working well
This arguing has all but replaced every decent emotion left between the two of them. Acquaintances, friends, and family alike hesitate to come around because they know; better than those two, how the gathering will end up, with the them fussing and fighting yet again. Sadly, the fights are always over the trivial of things, at least they sound that way to their company, family and friends. Things have gotten so hard between the two of them, that they can't even fake it anymore, not even long enough to entertain their company.
Now,....She has tried relentlessly to show him the error of his ways, without seeing her own of course. Hey what's there to see, she is the Good Christian Wife, right. But he's not listening to any of that, not any more. As women, our desire is to rule over our husbands, because everyone knows "Women are just plain smarter"?... NOT! we just want our men to do what ever we say is all. She could ask him earnestly, constantly, and without wavering, desperate to get him to see things her way, but does he hear her? No, not really, oh he hears a voice but because he's no longer in tune with her hearts voice, there's no more compramising. This too has past into a distant memory.
The Godly husband is straying, he has been listening to the ungodly console men's voice. You see, he's been told by them, that he's just being henpecked and needs to come out more and see how they do things. You know; ungodly console men, this can be devastating to a married couple. This advice is usually given by those who's wives and have already left them, but they're trying to convince your husband, that this is the life, being on he's own, with no wife or children to be responsible for. Just good times with his buddies, After work, it's all playtime with whomever and wherever he choses to be.
As for the good Christian women, She stands, hoping and praying things will change, and the two of them will soon become an item again. Rekindling those old flames that once drew them together initially. Fall forward into Passionate Love again with each other. With him spending more time at home with her and the kids, if the kids are still around, if not, spending more time with her; the good Christian wife. And the two of them giving each other their undivided attention, doing little things together again the way they use to before the children were ever born, You know like dating.
But the good Christian women waits on her husband as if he were God. And WISDOM tells her continue cooking his meals, cleaning his home, washing his clothes, drawing his bath water, waiting for him to come in from work, with a smile on her face, and dress to impress/intice him. When he comes home asking him honey, how was your day? are you tired? can I do anything for you? are you ready to have your dinner? would you like a cool drink?
He'll usually grumble back, because he's fainting, in his mind and because of the pressures of work no, no, no, maybe yes to the cool drink, or the newspaper and the remote.... Just give it to him, again being as pleasant as you can be, a kind word will turn anger away. After all he's probably had enough snapbacks, from his coworkers, and doesn't need to hear any from us. Or, he'll most likely think to himself, if she says another word to me, I'm going to leave the house, so I don't have to hear this nagging women complain. While he's out there trying to get some peace of mind, because he may have been belittled at work, and most probably made to think he's incompetent because of a bad decision he made. He should have been able to come home for his refuge, and not get it from the women waiting at the corner for him to come out to her.
These women usually have days consisting of either staying home, primping getting ready for your husband or someone else's, roaming the streets, sleeping with any man that will have them, since they don't have a husband of their own,
taking the married men with them down this notorious road to nowhere called hell. Ending up at nothing's door, this is not, however; a new thing to the married men, no not at all you see, he's been down this road before, but his wife has always taken him back. Oh yeah, the good Christian women gets angry, for a while, and probably has left the husband for a period of time, but always returns or let him come to wherever she and the kids went, to get away from him in the first place.
The husbandmen, need to wake up and realize that these good Christian woman, are their "Good Thing", that God says he should find. She, (the good Christian wife), has dreams of her own, and could be successful at them, but she chooses to stay at home, sometimes all alone wondering where he is or with whom he's with. But she waits for his return; not that she has to. She could be out and about, having fun with her Cohorts as well. But, this good Christian woman, has a covenant with God, as well as her husband. She chooses to wait on the Lord.
She's heard of countless testimonies where, God has healed marriages just like hers and the couples lives are changed for the better. She knows her Lord and her ears are open to his voice another voice she will not follow. She's governed by Wisdom, she's waiting on the Gold, she has put too many years into this marriage and wants to see the excellency of God in it. Because she know the anointing God has placed on her husband's life, she's been praying for his, (Yeah Lord), for too long to give up now. Eventhough, things between them are not nearly where they should be, she keeps standing in the gap for him, because she knows his deliverance is neigh, and when he's delivered, she's delivered because they're one.
She knows this because, things have been getting increasingly worse. If you know anything of the Spirit realm, you know that things usually get worse, before they get better. Then all at once; there's a sudden and miraculous change. No, the husband doesn't just start doing everything the good Christian wife tells him to do, quite the contrary, But he starts listening to a different voice, the voice of the (Holy Spirit), and starts doing everything he tells him to do.
This husbandmen, has awaken to the truth? The truth of.......
Ephesians 5:25 (KJV) Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church and gave himself up for it (her), 26 that he might sanctify and cleanse it (her) with the washing of water by the word, 27 that he might present it (her) to himself a glorious church, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing: but that it (she) should be holy and without blemish. 28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife, loveth himself. 29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh: but nourisheth and cherisheth it (her), even as the Lord the church:
30 For we are members of His body, of His flesh, and of His bones. 31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be ONE flesh. 32 This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. 33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular, so love his wife even as himself; and THE WIFE SEE THAT SHE REVERENCE (respects) HER HUSBAND.
Love in Christ
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If we husbands would strengthen and deepen our relationship with Christ, we would have much stronger and deeper relationships with our wives. Great article Carol.