As I peered down toward the ground I could see rivers of blood pouring from my hands, right through my fingertips rushing to the earth beneath me and as if in slow-motion, my tears followed. I failed again, and His blood was on my hands. Many non-religious people have this pre-conceived notion that Christians are perfect or we think we are, and to those who think you are, please do not come near me, you will scare me. Because, the truth of the matter is that, we (Christians) are trying to live our life to the fullest in light of the Heart of God leading us, who are cold and blind and calloused and who still need a savior after we receive Him (Jesus). The Christian life is not an easy road. It is a beautiful one though, it is a conglomeration of something beautiful (transforming; from God) and something messy (impediment; from sinful nature). So a beautiful mess if you will. My goal is to not preach, but to dispel some God-aweful rumors, that there is a certain code or certain slant of perfection, and there is not, it is in the full surrender and realization of who we are and who HE is.
This story is not about self-deprecation, but, how sometimes, I screw up and it seems more natural than not screwing up. And I hate that part of me. Sometimes I wonder what I am doing in as a church ministry person, although, God used Moses mightily and he had a past of being known as a stuttering murder, and God restored him. So, I will continue to walk the crooked road, that are continously traversed with detours that are seductively matched to seduce me and continue to fly the uncharted cloud spotted skies ahead. Because, I am in, and my curiousity and passion is much more than this blood that does yes come much more frequently (at least it seems so) than the blue skies and sunny days. But, I also look back and see those too, it is just hard to see the sun sometimes when the rain and clouds want nothing to do with anything beautiful. On the flipside though, rain washes things clean.
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George, this is a good, and thought-provoking article. And it has stirred these thoughts in me..."If we will continue to reach out our hand for JESUS to take hold of and lead the way, even in the rain and clouds we will see the beauty of his light. And jus think! The light (blue skies/sunny days) and the dark (clouds/rain) are the same to him because he created both! I don't know about anyone else, but for me, another one who messes up at times, that brings hope and comfort to my heart! (Barbara)
A very good article George. Yes, we all mess up at times whether in mouth or action. Sometimes our mouths can be far more harmful then we ever imagined. I do believe however, that God is shaping us and molding us into what He wants us to be. A cake has some pretty yucky ingredients if you were to taste them by themselves, but when put together, "Yummy!"
He is just wanting to make us, "Yummy," smile!