I cried out to you today
Praying you would hear.
Nothing that I do or say
Ever seems too clear.
I made my bed this morning.
Thought youíld be so proud.
Whyíd you have to look beneath
Then tell in a crowd?
My grades were alright this time.
Only made one C.
Guess that wasnít good enough.
Youíre sure mad at me.
At church I try to listen
And note a few words.
You told friends I couldnít quote
One thing I had heard.
You think you know me so well.
You donít have a clue.
Trying to live up to you. . .
One thing I can't do.
So now Iíve prayed youíll listen
And maybe youíll see.
I donít care if Iím the best.
Please just notice me.
This poem may appear to be for the child of a perfectionist. Actually, although I have been that child, I am now the parent. I am struggling to remember those feelings and improve my own attitude.
My children are quickly growing older and are nearing their teenage years. It is difficult, at times, to realize I need to encourage them to become adults. That includes allowing some imperfections.
During my teenage years, there were times when I thought my mother was horrible. I now regret many of my own actions against her. She was (and still is) a wonderful mom who did the best she knew how.
Perhaps I can take those negative feelings of the past and improve my parental actions in the future.
Maybe the next time my children 'clean their room' by making their bed and storing the clutter underneath, I will attempt to remain calm. With a smile on my face I could say, "The bed looks great. Thank you for making it. That is a great start to cleaning up and I look forward to coming back and seeing what you do with all that stuff underneath."
I'm sure I will make plenty of mistakes during my attempt to be a great mom. I imagine my boys will sometimes think that I am horrible. My promise is to always do the best I can.
My dream is that I will learn from my own mom's regrets and my children will learn from mine. Maybe one day, generations from now, the improvement will be so great that one of my great, great, great-grandchildren will be the perfect parent.
Hey, it's my dream and I'll dream big if I want to!
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