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There are many ways to turn the "normal activities of life" into moments of blessing and teaching for your kids, and no matter how young, no matter how assured they seem to be as an almost-adult teen.
1. Decisions - Let your kids make some. I learned to ask my daughter
(this was training from my career in sales), "Do you want to wear the red outfit or the blue one today?" and she would pick one. If she was hesitant, I would give her a few seconds and they say, "Pick one or I will decide for you." She would usually decide. For the past couple years, of course, she's often suggested a third option. And, if it's reasonable, I go with it--not just in apparel, but everything. "Do you want to eat an apple or grapefruit along with your cereal?"
This also comes to deciding a new grocery item to buy one week, a new activity, a new movie to watch, etc.
2. Ask them to help you make up a song or poem, especially silly
ones. Miss T (also known as Queen V when she creates a greeting card for
her personal line, or hosts her own birthday party) and I continue to
work at the ongoing project, "O Christmas Tweet" and will let you know
when it is complete. (Possibly Christmas 2006)
3. Let them have a pet to learn responsibility. My daughter has a puppy at her dad's, but we are starting with a fish at our house. And she is doing well, remembering to feed him every day, and has learned to change out the water without (1) damaging the bowl, or (2) even more important, without damaging the fish.
She also teaches him various things, from Bible verses, to the denominations (not of churches) of money, and why they all spend differently. He has been taught that, should he ever need to choose among denominations it is always best to start with dollars.
In addition, she has taught him the planets, including the non-planet, Pluto, and reviews them with him. She's even talked back and forth with him in Spanish....but she has noticed that, no matter what the subject, he always seems to have Mom's voice.
4. Now, where was I? Oh yes, # 4. Allowances. Not only financial payment for services rendered (more or less) by your little learner, but allowances in learning. As parents, we too must remember that we did not get everything right the first time, nor the second, nor sometimes the third......and sometimes we still don't.
Most important is to teach your kids to tithe, no matter how young. For as Malachi 3:10-12 state, the first tenth (off the gross, not the net!) is the LORD's, and there are many blessings to obeying this command! After the tithe, we lead Victoria to give offerings of the money she earns or is given. She is now a senior and learning to use a checking account and budget her money even more carefully. She likes to buy gifts for people, and that is good. She is very generous. However, we often explain to her that she is a gifted artist and writer and an original drawing or writing by her is a welcome gift by many people--something they cannot buy. She is also saving for college and planning, and applying for scholarships and grants.
5. Teach them to use equipment, carefully, and tell them that you know they are wise in using it. For instance, I started telling my daughter for years before she ever started driving that she is an excellent driver. She started on a riding lawnmower, going forward, backward, parallel parking, etc. And, once she got in a car, she is, of course, an excellent driver. She has even mentioned to me that I the speed limit is "only 55" or that I should not drive in flip-flops. My teaching is coming back to me!
6. Teach them to cook. I started a bit too early with Miss Victoria, but I have gradually let her do more and more, and she enjoys it. And I enjoy it when she does.
7. Teach them to plant and tend a seed, then the plant, then harvest
the fruit, while imparting the spiritual lessons of sowing, patience, and reaping.
8. Tell them every day--first thing, middle, last--how much you love them, that you are pleased with them, that you are thankful for them, and that they bring you great joy. My daughter loved this till she became an older teen, and then it seemed to bother her, but I kept on. She has come back around and, even if she rolls her eyes, I think she secretly still likes to hear it. Anyway, we're going to keep saying it and she can't stop it from going in her ears! Also be sure to remind them that, as much as you love them, God loves them even more!
I'll soon post the final part of Blessing Your Kids--Part Three.
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Sometimes in my own struggles and frustrations, I have not always done the best job. But I am so hopeful that God is going to restore everything to both Him and myself that we've lost. I already know that he is going to be strong, bold, and fearless for God.
Again, thanks for your wisdom. I'll be striving to put it into practice along with continued prayer and the Lord's counsel.