NAKED AND SECURED
by Bolaji Olusola Timothy
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NAKED AND SECURED
"And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed".
Often times, the thought of the nakedness of Adam and Eve may be correlated with the picture of the primitive human being. However, this was not an accident; it was purposeful and significant in the home. The speaking of the fundamental nature of the home instituted should characterize any that must experience stability, peace, productivity, dominion and fulfillment.
Nakedness is a state of complete openness and exposure of person, a matter and situation. Actually, it is not possible for a couple to be together without a form of nakedness at least, physically. But, it does not signify that they are really open to each other. Their mind, dream, vision, anticipation, pursuits, projects and friendship/ fellowship may completely be locked off. Speeches are calculated, thoughts are shielded, actions are ordered, and responses are edited, friendship and fellowship protected at the expenses of the openness at home. In the attempt to secure some things, the home is left unprotected!
One of the principles recommended for successful home and mostly marriage is absolute and continuous nakedness or openness at home by every member. The man and his wife were both naked and could not conceive any wrong in it. The moment openness is being perceived unnecessary, insecurities takes over and build up until it is capable of giving such home temporary or permanent frictions and separation.
The nakedness (openness) is a means of encouraging sincere and perfect intimacy between couples. In true nakedness, pride is buried; there is perfect submission to each other. The couples feel secured, loved, respected, accepted, honored, important, responsible and encouraged.
This openness is the revelation of every area of a man or women's life. It is an exposure to each otherís past and present, the financial, emotional, spiritual, physical, health, career, relatives, fellowship and friendship. If all these areas and more are exposed to each other, this is called true openness, and it must be continuous and mutual. It is a lot work and it worth it for a happy home.
The true openness is a prerequisite for a home. However, it appears that this have tendency to decrease with increase in existence of the home except a conscious effort is always taken to keep this, up level every moment. It required a periodical evaluations and retreat to ensure that the home is still on track of openness, love and unity.
Openness at home is often threatened by few things/ attitude at home. And these attitudes are potent at discouraging the home-
Alone /partial faithfulness: There is no home that can ever survive in the absence of faithfulness. However, this is required by every member of the home to comply dutifully. Each home should have a primary goal in order to fulfill a known purpose. This is expected to be understood by every member of the home. Commitment to faithfulness is expected from husband and wife. Alone faithfulness is when only a member is faithful to the goal and purpose of their home, while the other is not. When a member is faithful in one area or the order, while his or her partner is not, it is painful! Openness will be rear in such vicinity. If only the husband or the wife is faithful in their course, common goal, purpose, peace and success of the home, it could be seriously discouraging.
Openness involve the sharing of treasured secret, resources, time, principles and purpose with one's spouse in a situation that one of these take advantage of over the other and these shared valuables to satisfy or further a personal course, goal or agenda is a grave threat to openness. When any shared secret is used as a tool to afflict or inflict physical or psychological pain on the other member of the home, it erodes trust. This will lead to stressed trust and when trust is been stressed beyond the limit of endurance, fears set in on the victim and he or she will no longer be comfortable to share any treasures of their heart, subsequently; The degree of uncertainties increases thereafter.
The practice of openness has tendency to decrease or reduce with increase in years of marriage except an acute commitment to establish this from time to time is a usual practice. This will necessitate the commitment of both partners to each other. In this case, trust is encouraged and respected. Sacrifice and selflessness is embedded deeply in each display of attitude. However, these will always be attacked from time to time in every home. The moment uncertainties take hold of relationship between a man and a woman, the less the possibilities of openness in that home.
Frankly speaking, it is difficult to keep openness at home without the experience of crucified life. In this case, self is constantly dealt with and the fruit of the spirit is effective and relevant in individual life.
Selfishness and self-centeredness have destroyed a lot of home. It put pressure on any member of the home who is a victim and where both are afflicted with considerable threshold of this act of selfishness rather than being a team, they are committed opponents, each fighting for their personal interest thereby ripping the family apart and creating fissures for the enemy to strike. Many husband and wife have been sacrificed on the altar of selfishness. For every selfishness to survive, it must be at the expense of sacrifice of someone (the victim) definitely not by the selfish fellow.
This selfishness had made men and women careless, neglecting the needs of others, abandoning their fundamental roles and responsibility at home and to their spouse; thereby exposing their partners to embarrassment, hardship and pains.
This is one of the attitudes the marriages in the records of real success are committed to.
I sincerely pray that God will give us grace to keep this always evident in our various homes.
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