2 Timothy 1:7 - For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.
Midnight, 1995
Here I am again, Lord, trembling in my own hallway. I'm just going to check on the children. I know there isn't really anything to be afraid of, is there? Each and every time I enter this hall lately, fear grips me.
Lord, I'm sure I look ridiculous taking these baby steps with my whole body tightly clinging to the wall. I have to make it to their rooms though, Lord. That jerk I married is asleep. This is the only chance I'll have to check on them. You know their rooms are my safe haven. . .
OK Lord, Timmy looks so peaceful lying there. Hopefully I won't wake him with my hand on his back. You know I have to feel the little rise and fall of his back for reassurance. OK. He's breathing. Thank you for this precious child. He has always been so easy to care for. I'm so thankful for his independence.
Dear Lord, I'm going back out there. If I don't hurry, the jerk will wake up. Oh no, there's that creepy feeling again. What is with this hallway? I've never been afraid of the dark, Lord. This fear is overwhelming. Oh, please help me get to AJ's room quickly. . .
Oh look, Lord, he's so precious. Please let me see the rise and fall of his chest. You know if I touch him he will wake up. If he wakes up he will cry. If he cries, the jerk will wake up. If the jerk wakes up we are all in for a sleepless night. Can you believe that jerk nailed these quilts to AJ's wall thinking it would drown out the noise of his crying. I can't handle another night of him holding me down to keep me from comforting my own child. Please let me see AJ breath. There it is. Thank you, Lord.
Lord, I need your strength. I have to get back to the bedroom. Six years I've been married and it feels like an eternity of hell. I can't go on like this. Whatever this is in the hallway feels so real. Oh Lord, please make it go away. . .
Dear Lord, I thank you for the precious pastor who pointed me to your word for power over my fears. Thank you for being faithful to deliver us from our terrors. I pray that I can now be a light to others who face similar situations.
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I think any mother has been there. Where you stand until you see that movement or breath of life prove to you that all is well. I was so blessed by this article. It is a comfort to know that God has not given us a spirit of fear; but of love, power and a sound mind! God Bless
Teresa, you have learned a valued lesson. God never fails us and He will never leave us. If God be for us, who can be against us; certainly no demon formed in hell can possess us. Not with the Holy Spirit dwelling in us. They can frighten us when we forget who we are, but they can't indwell us. The Holly Spirit takes up ALL the indwelled space in our being and He won't share it with anything! Keep living His Word, and fear not!
