*This is a poem about how I grew up with my earthly Daddy, and about how my heart still can feel this way now, when I try to give him affection, etc. (This is not a reference to how I feel about God in any way). I thought I would try to empty out my feelings so that others, who have or currently are growing up in this kind of situation, even those adults who have a relationship like this with their Dad, will know that there is always hope and that they're not alone.
“DADDY”
By: Lisa Velez
October 1st, 2003
FOR AS LONG AS I CAN REMEMBER
I’VE TRIED TO GET CLOSER TO YOU
THOUGHTS OF HOLDING YOUR HAND AGAIN
PLAY REPEATEDLY IN MY MIND
WE WERE THE BEST OF FRIENDS
WHEN I WAS A LITTLE GIRL
I THOUGHT WE SHARED A BOND,
LIKE NONE OTHER IN THE WORLD
BUT THEN I STARTED TO GROW UP AND
EVERYTHING CHANGED
OH-I DON’T UNDERSTAND
WHAT WENT WRONG, TO THIS DAY
TELL ME HOW
HOW DO I GET YOU CLOSE TO ME?
SHOW ME NOW
IS THERE SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME THAT YOU SEE?
DON’T YOU KNOW
HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU?
WILL YOU EVER LET ME IN?
(PLEASE)-OPEN UP YOUR HEART AND LET ME BE
YOUR LITTLE GIRL, AGAIN
MY HEART BREAKS ALL OVER AGAIN
WHEN I THINK ABOUT THOSE TIMES, BACK THEN
AS I TRIED TO GAIN ACCEPTANCE
IN THE ARMS OF YOUR AFFECTION
YET, YOU SEEMED SO VERY DISTANT
ALWAYS ANGRY WITH THE WORLD
AND I WONDERED WHAT COULD BE SO WRONG
WITH ME, YOUR LITTLE GIRL?
OH AND SADLY, SOMETIMES I ASK MYSELF
DO YOU REALLY LOVE ME AT ALL?
I CAN’T EVEN HUG YOU
CUZ YOU HOLD YOURSELF SO TIGHT
WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF?
WILL YOU EVER LET ME TRY?
OH DADDY
I KNOW YOU LIVE A LIFE THAT’S FULL OF
CRAZY PAINFUL DAYS
BUT IS THAT ANY REASON, TO INSULT AND CALL ME NAMES?
I’M NOW A YOUNG WOMAN, WITH MY OWN GOD-GIVEN MIND
WHAT’S IT GONNA TAKE
FOR YOU, TO STOP
PUSHING ME ASIDE?
(JUST)-BREAK AWAY YOUR PRIDE
HOW MANY TIMES MUST I CRY?
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