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HOPE FOR OUR HOME Part Two Choice making
by Bolaji Olusola Timothy
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Choice Making “I will make a helpmeet comparable unto him”.

Actually , there are so many philosophies and principles with resspect to  making a choice of a  spouse. This ranges from God’s choices to dating and gambling. Majority of crises in homes starts from this critical junction in life. The choice of who to marry are placate on many platforms such as social and religious status, power and wealth influences, housekeeping and changing marital status, infatuation, lust and sex mate, greed and sympathy, only few are truly based on Love.

Love is a common vocabulary in the film and entertainment industries. It is one of the most misused words in our world and generation. The actions and reaction of many revealed that only few  people understand and have experienced enduring love widely professed or sang about. Love is often misunderstood with lust, infatuation and greed for sex. People with incorrect understanding of love do  experience “Idle Love”.Real love is dynamic, being responsible to him/her, no matter what!.

It is a wonderful foundation for every successful home. The fact that two people have feelings for each other does not imply they love. Men and women are emotionally wired in such away that any form of relationship can result into having feelings for each other. More so, when two people share their ideas, problems, challenges, dreams and time , the cord of affinity is being activated, emotional involvement may thereafter emerge . This emotional feeling is often referred to as love in many quarters. However, it does not justify the compatibility that is necessary for a fulfilled home- A help meet comparable unto him! When God noticed the gap, hole and weakness of man, He said “I will make a helpmeet comparable to him”. Helpmeet and comparable were not words chosen carelessly or casually in the book of Genesis 2.

Choice making for a life partner requires a deep sleep. This does not mean sleeping deeply physically and expecting a beautiful woman or handsome man to appear in the dream. NO ! That deep sleep means submission, patience, willing to follow accredited procedure to get your only best partner and trusting in God and his grace to make a help mate comparable to fulfilling God’s given purpose and your vision. It is easier for a person of calm spirit to see and interprets a necessary image appropriately than playing sentiment while choosing a spouse . The principle of sleeping as related to choice making was well described by Gbile Akanni in his book “Not two but one”. There are so many common things painted in the film industry that were calculated intention to distract and deceive large population of young people seeking for love and acceptance.

Whichever method is employed in identifying and recognising a life partner, selecting and binding with this fellow and building a Godly home with Godly seeds require preparation of our heart. In order to achieve this, purposefulness towards this must take precedence and control our emotion. It is advisable that anyone seeking to make choice must not be involved emotionally first, if, then decisions and actions are already compromised. being a freind at first is enough! A credible pursuit and focus about life is a prerequisite. Calmness, patience and prayer are very necessary. This was what Adam was subjected to (Genesis 2:18). He was physically, biologically, spiritually and career wise established but needed help meet comparable unto him.

I know dating has so many definitions and intentions, it is not enough to sample and attempt to discover the heart of a man or woman who deliberately gets along with you for a wrong purpose. Some people will scheme you up, to steal you valuable virtues-from you and once this is done, the victim is dumped –The heart of man is DEEP and desperately wicked. Discovering a comparable help mate requires a painstaking, prayerful, patient and prepared mind to achieve this.

The fact that a supposed helpmate and comparable spouse is located or known with all clarity, love between each other  is real and growing does not rule out the possibility of challenges. In fact, each home will have her unique challenges. However, they have quality and virtue to bind them lovingly, caringly and purposefully in any spiritual, financial, physical, health and parental challenges.

Subsequently, in the family formed by Adam and Eve, they had their challenges while out of Eden. They bound together because they were helpmate and comparable.


It is unfortunate that there are many Dinah and Samson who will not ABIDE. Such ones are going to build a relationship that cannot withstand external forces and when injured such may not be able to recover perfectly.

If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be! TRUST JESUS NOW

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