I believe in miracles. I have witnessed quite a few with my own two eyes; therefore, I can never doubt the healing power of God. I can't get into debates as to why God chooses to heal some people back to life, and why He chooses to allow others to die to this mortal world. All I know is He is omnipotent and He is able to do all things.
At the beginning of my junior year of college, my baby cousin Jasmine, became sick, hospitalized, and diagnosed with Leukemia. I spent several nights at the hospital with her, to ease her fears of being alone. I watched endless amounts of Spongebob Squarepants to escape reality and laugh along with her during the pain. I was faithful to God, and believed strongly in my heart that He was going to heal. As my Junior year ended, Jazzy was doing better and was released from the hospital. I was happy, thanking God for His healing.
My senior year of college, I had ants in my pants to graduate. I was ready to finish and get the heck out of there. Much had changed within a year. I was a new single mother and I was ready to start a life with my new baby girl. All was going well, until I received a phone call saying that Jasmine had been readmitted into the hospital. This was usual, she often would have to visit for treatments or blood, but when I visited her this time, something was unusual. She looked different. Her skin was dry, her lips were cracked, her face was swollen. Her mother was crying.
My baby girl and I spent almost every single day at the hospital for over a month, laughing with and loving on my Jazzy. My grades were slipping. I spoke to my Professors and shared with them my issue and God gave me favor with every last Professor. My grades improved with extra work and less class absence penalties. I had to be there with my cousin. I needed her to see me there. During a night of prayer at the hospital, with my mom and family, the Lord spoke clearly into my spirit, "She shall live again." I was so grateful to God for hearing and answering our prayers!
Less than a week later, I received a frantic call from Jazzy's sister, saying she was dying. A ton of bricks hit my gut. I was speechless. I needed her to slow down and explain to me what was going on. I was at the hospital the night before, and she was living, or at least breathing. Immediately we rushed to the hospital, only to find her lifeless body. I was devastated. Our family was there, her church family was there, her friends were there, all standing in a room with her lifeless body, trying to grasp hold of losing this tween burst of joy so early.
I was confused, because I was certain of the voice I heard (John 10:27) the night we prayed, yet I was looking at my dead cousin's body. Tears poured down my face, as I stood in a corner alone. My heart was in great pain. My cousin spent many days and nights with me before she got sick, she was "my girl". I loved her so much. Her Pastor saw my grief and came over to me. He held me close and said, "She's not dead. She's only asleep. She shall live again."
If you are in a situation or facing a loss of a loved one, don't get caught up on words, but get caught up in the Word, God's Word. To live on this earth is only temporary, God has greater for us in His heavenly kingdom, where there is no pain, no hurt, no disease, or heartache, only an eternity of joy, peace, and happiness.
"As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return...so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it." (Isaiah 55: 8-11)