This Is Going To Hurt
by Andy Castro
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Psalm 42:7 (AMP)
[Roaring] deep calls to [roaring] deep at the thunder of Your waterspouts; all Your breakers and Your rolling waves have gone over me.
This is not a description of a gentle God. It sounds like God is trying to drown the writer with a mighty vengeance. I love this description and I need it to be true in my life. Let me try to explain why.
The apostle Paul prayed for the Ephesians to know the depth of God’s love. I’m sure I will never completely know this because God is Love. It’s too deep to comprehend. I can’t comprehend the depth of the core of the earth so how could I ever truly know the depth of His love. I see the first three words of the above Psalm, “[Roaring] deep calls…” as God calling. He is as a roaring Lion that loves us with an incomprehensive love and He is calling to something. What is He calling? He’s calling to another “roaring deep”.
Recently God has called to a “roaring deep” in my life. He has called to deep emotional injuries of my past. And He has called to it with a vengeance to be feared. Jesus said He came to give us life and life to the full. One way for Him to give us life to the full is to heal us emotionally from past pains.
Emotional pain is a bit different than physical pain. In most cases we can narrowly pinpoint the cause of a physical pain. It can be very different with emotional pain. In many cases it will take years to expose its disfigured head. It may take a tragic event or help from a therapist. And if we don’t confront it head on, it will lead us to a sad, pathetic and regrettable end of life. I don’t want that for me or you.
Once exposed, the Spirit of God will get very definitive and go to the root of the pain. For us it’s a dreadful journey through an intense hidden path that leads us to the graveyard of our emotional disfigurement. This path is hidden by the wilderness of an untamed jungle created by our neglect, disregard and dismissing the fact that we have a deeply infected injury. And to get through the jungle of our bitter justifications, we need to take hold of the Spirit of the Lord until He blesses us. We must take hold of our spiritual machete, the Word of God, and allow it to cut away the untamed jungle of our soul. Hebrews 4:12 (AMP) says: “For the Word that God speaks is alive and full of power [making it active, operative, energizing, and effective]; it is sharper than any two-edged sword, penetrating to the dividing line of the breath of life (soul) and [the immortal] spirit, and of joints and marrow [of the deepest parts of our nature], exposing and sifting and analyzing and judging the very thoughts and purposes of the heart.” Your heart was injured and Jesus came to heal the brokenhearted.
It will be extremely difficult at times to confront the source of the brokenness. But remember Psalm 23:4. Yes, though I walk through the [deep, sunless] valley of the shadow of death, I will fear or dread no evil, for You are with me; Your rod [to protect] and Your staff [to guide], they comfort me.
What next? If you feel suffocated or overwhelmed with life and you can’t seem to hear from God or get a sense of direction, it may be the Lord has His rolling waves over you. Maybe He is calling you to go deeper with Him. If so, you have two choices.
1. Panic and do nothing but continue in the neglect of your injury. In this case you will notice the infection will lead to a slow agonizing spiritual and emotional death. Your relationships will not flourish. You will live a shallow and incomplete life. But the most devastating result will be living out phantom Christianity, not ever knowing the depth of God’s love for you.
2. Admit your need for deep healing and allow the God of Love to cleanse you with His healing power.
What will you do? I encourage you to pick up your machete (The Word) and allow it to cut away the untamed jungle of your soul. Let the depth of God’s love go to the depths of your brokenness and heal you. I promise you He is faithful to finish the good work He started in you.
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