The Bible verses we shared in part one, helps us to understand that marriage is not just about leadership and submission but also about teamwork. The latter part states: “…For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh…” Recognising that we are a team and not two individuals, our attitudes changed towards each other. It didn’t happen overnight. It was a miraculous change, although it wasn’t a miracle of sudden change. It took a Marriage Encounter Weekend, continuous praying and fasting, hard labour of putting the needs of the other before self (even when it didn’t come naturally), a library of books, several counselling sessions and some amazing people we call wingless angels. We had to make a decision to love each other, despite the pain. It was a necessary process and it wasn’t pleasurable. Sacrifices had to be made. Had it not been for the commitment to God, to each other and to the marriage our story would have been a different one today.
When married couples are going through marital problems, they can sometimes feel like they are the only ones facing those struggles. They are afraid to ask for help for fear of what others might think of them and their marriage. We’ve been there! We didn’t feel we could confide in anyone and so we went through a great deal of our struggles alone. It crippled our marriage. Thankfully, we turned our focus on the One who instituted marriage. Today we have a testimony that God saved our marriage. He rescued us from ourselves and our selfish ways; opened our eyes to the truth as we read the Bible; revealing Himself to us through people with Christ-like character. He then brought us to a place of repentance. It was a painful process but we went through it and He restored our marriage.
Naturally, there are some things married couples need to keep within the marriage and both partners need to work together in bringing resolution. However, for that to happen they must be communicating with each other. In situations like these it is necessary to do some research. That might mean going to seminars or workshops, buying DVDs or books, surfing the internet for articles via websites or blogs where there are resources dealing with the issues that they are struggling with. Unfortunately, there are many resources available that are not always credible, so always check the Bible for confirmation and discard the ones that encourage you to do things that are against the word of God. It may not be illegal, what they are suggesting, but not all things are in line with God’s will for you or your marriage (see 1st Cor. 6:12). Be careful of what you allow your mind to process.
Continues in Part 3 ~ Conflict in Marriage
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