Well, sweet grassy, grassy grass, this is my kind of place. Soft under my feet and green and scrumptious, I could stay here all the way into the nighttime and then some. Of course, Momíll probably ruin it for me and make me move onto something less tasty. I never get thatówhat makes her move me when Iím perfectly happy, doing nothing wrong, just eating this gr . . . nom, nom, nom.
Oh! Thereís another bundle of even longer grass! Iíll edge my way slowlyócanít have Mom noticing. Itís only grass, but you know what moms are like. Wow! Another one! Itís like a path set up just for me! Itís meant to be. What a great idea to bring us all here. I feel so freeeeeeee.
Iím getting really full now. All this grass is making me waddle, but one more cluster wonít hurt me. Ahhh, delightful. Now if I can just walk up this hill. I think thatís the way I came . . . no, it was this tree I walked past . . . uh . . . this one? No, it was definitely this bush, not a tree. In I go . . . turn, look up . . .
Iím lying here on my back in a very awkward position, all wrapped up like a Christmas present in leaves and twigsóau naturale I think they call it these days. I donít necessarily want to scream for help, cuz then theyíll all know what I did. Iíd rather keep that a secret for now. Maybe if I move this leg to the sky, and this one to that tree. . . .
Well that sure was a bad idea.
Okay, you got me, friends. I messed up. Iím the bad guy here. You guys go on eating your happy grass in your happy field without me. Never mind me, even though my right leg has touched every dot on the Twister board by now and my left eyeball has an uncanny view of my butt.
Sigh. Iím going to get it good now . . . fer reals! ďDonít leave the family; weíre a team; donít let the grass distract youóitís just food; be a good exampleÖ.Ē Blah, blah, flipping blah. Iím going to have to suck it up now and spit it out there. I do feel kinda bad thoughóprodigal son and all that. Okay. Here I go:
I WAS WRONG. BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. YOU WERE RIGHT. BAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. HELP!!! BAAAAAAAAAAAA!
And all of a sudden, there it is. That hard curve of wood around my neck, lifting up my head so I can see. In comes the staff again, pulling away branches and leaves, and then those two big hands kneel beside me and push me onto my feet. I take one look at those sandals and wonder if I should make a run for it before I get an earful, but if I do that, Iíll be running from the only place Iíve ever known safety. Two big arms make their way around my belly and Iím lifted off the ground and held close to his chest, but not before he looks me in the eye and lets me see his deep, deep love. I shed a tear . . . or two . . . man-to-man, like.
And together we saunter back to the others . . . and Mom . . . as if I never did a thing.
PLEASE ENCOURAGE AUTHOR,
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