JACK & JILL – and FORNICATION - ADULTERY – DIVORCE AND MARRIAGE!
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We need to cover all the bases concerning MARRIAGE – then FORNICATION – then ADULTERY – and finally – DIVORCE.
To make the point, I will use Jack and Jill.
Here’s my new version of the old poem of Jack and Jill:
“Jack and Jill – went up the hill – pushing their baby carriage. But Jack fell down, with Jennifer – on the ground – and there went a perfectly good marriage.”
Using the above scenario and poem, let’s first discuss “holy matrimony” – aka “marriage”.
God intended for man not to be alone…..”It is not good for man to be alone” – Genesis 2:18.
Therefore in verse 24 of Genesis 2, God declared, "Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh."
Here, we discover that God tells us that when a man takes a wife….(they are married), and they become one flesh (married – joined together as one). There were no “Marriage Certificates” until the so-called Middle Ages. That was between the 5th and 15th centuries. Before then, in God’s eyes, one became married when he asked a maid (virgin) to become his wife.
The “marriage” was consummated when the “husband” slept with (committed fornication or the act of sexual intercourse) with his wife. In God’s eyes, this consummation of the “marriage” (no permit) was the moment of “marriage”, and it is when both became one flesh. They were bound together as one – “married”.
God says that fornication – the act of having sexual intercourse with your spouse is NOT A SIN. It only becomes sin when you fornicate with anyone outside of marriage. Then, in God’s eyes….the one who commits fornication outside of marriage is a “whoremonger” or whore – aka harlot – aka – prostitute – aka sinner – aka adulterer if they are married and committing fornication with one other than their spouse.
The proof of this is found in God’s Word – the Bible. Hebrews 13:4 – “Marriage is honorable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.”
There are consequences for committing sins. Jesus paid for them all on the cross, and those who have accepted Him as their Lord and Savior are forgiven of ALL SINS – past, present and future. Therefore, those who are not “born again” are never forgiven, and they will pay for their sins because God must punish sin – ALL SIN, and that punishment is separation from Him – forever….in a place called the “Lake of Fire”.
For the Christian, however, although there is forgiveness for all sins….including fornication, adultery, etc. (sex outside of marriage), God says , “There will be consequences” as a result of committing sins.
I MUST ELABORATE ON MARRIAGE – FORNICATION – ADULTERY – AND DIVORCE because about 99% of us have been taught wrong from the pulpits or other sources like boks - about all of it. Let me continue!
Let’s use Jack and Jill to illustrate.
Jack decided to ask Jill to become his wife. She said, “I do”. Why did Jack and Jill decide to get married? Could they not be friends forever? The apostle Paul gives us a clear understanding of WHY people get married.
Paul tells us, in 1 Corinthians 7:2, “But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband.”
Aha! Men and women wish to have sexual intercourse which may or may not produce offspring. If they wish to have offspring (“replenish the earth – be fruitful and multiply” – Genesis 1:28) then this act requires “fornication”. Totally “honorable” in God’s eyes, as we have already illustrated above.
Therefore, one can say that when Jack and Jill decided to “fornicate honorably”, they wanted to do it honorably before God, so they asked each other if they could become “one flesh” – married.
Before the Middle Ages, God honored marriage. After the Middle ages, God honored marriage, but the government required that Jack and Jill have a Marriage Certificate….a piece of paper defining that they choose to be married, and this gave each certain legal rights and property rights.
FORNICATION – NOT HONORABLE….outside of marriage.
Now comes Fornication outside of marriage. Jack is married – has been for let’s say ten years. He meets Jennifer at work. He begins to become attracted sexually to her.
Jesus says this in Matthew 5:27-28 – “Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looks on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.”
Jack is already guilty of “adultery” because he has lusted after one who is not Jill – his beloved wife of ten years.
What should poor Jack do now? He has choices. Turn from this “adulterous affair” that he’s having in his mind – or continue playing with that sin and, if Jack is a born-again believer, he will pay a severe consequence for continuing in this sin. 1 John 1:9 tells Jack, “If we confess our sins, God is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”
Jack could then choose to tell Jennifer, “Jenny – I’m attracted to you physically, but I am married and I love my wife, so I cannot – in good conscience – even be near you at work.” “It’s not you – it’s me” (Seinfeld)
ADULTERY SETS IN
Old Jack decides to take this “affair of the mind” that Satan sees as his weak spot, and he decides to have sex with Jennifer- who is married to a guy named Mark.
You need to follow the players in this Jack and Jill scenario because it will (or should) very clearly explain the sequence of Marriage (good), fornication (honorable so far) – Adultery (fornication outside of marriage) and the CONSEQUENCES of ADULTERY, which leads directly to DIVORCE.
The “players” in our story are: Jack and Jill who are happily married for ten years, and Jenifer and Mark who are happily married for ten years coincidentally!
Jack now arranges a rendezvous at the local motel with Jennifer who has also chosen to carry this illicit mental state to its logical conclusion…..fornication and adultery.
IF YOU HAVE SEX WITH ANYONE OTHER THAN YOU SPOUSE- GOD SAYS YOU HAVE BROKEN YOUR VOWS TO YOUR SPOUSE AND – YOU ARE AUTOMATICALY MARRIED TO THE ONE WITH WHOM YOU COMMIT ADULTERY!
Right now, you should be saying something like, “John – you are out of your mind…where do you come up with stuff like that?”
I highlighted that statement in yellow highlighter in my book entitled "You CAN Take It With You". I have completed about 350 pages of that book, and perhaps it will be ready for my online book store by the end of 2013.
When you see a highlighted statement, this writer intends to prove and emphasize something I say. So….here we go…pretend you see the highlights!
Get YOUR Bible out, and turn to 1 Corinthians 6:16. It reads this way: “What? know ye not that he which is joined to an harlot is one body? for two, saith he, shall be one flesh.”
In our scenario, that verse is saying, “Jack, are you not aware that if you join yourself to Jennifer, you two shall become one flesh, and ‘one flesh’ means married?”
Let’s first address the term “harlot” found in 1 Corinthians 6:16 above. You may mistakenly believe it means prostitute (and it does), but then you believe this only pertains to a husband who has sex with a “hooker”..one who charges money for sex…..male or female. You would be wrong.
“Harlot”- Genesis 34:30 - Greek - "One who commits fornication or adultery - same a whore." Fornication (whether single or not) and adultery happens when a married person commits fornication with someone other that their spouse. So a “harlot” is anyone who commits fornication and adultery with someone not their spouse.
Let me now make the connection between you and your sex partner (outside of the marriage) becoming one flesh or “married” to one another – in God’s eyes.
We have already read Genesis 2:24 - "Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh." (married) (wife), but we are revisiting that verse to remind you that God considers becoming “one flesh” – married!
Now, when Jesus told us, “But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away (in this case – a man who unilaterally breaks the bond through fornication and adultery with another) his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causes her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.” Matthew 5:32 –
Matthew 5: 32 - in PLAIN ENGLISH -
"But I say unto you, that whosoever shall break the holy bond of marriage to his lawful wife - because of fornication and adultery committed by him, that same man causes his wife to commit adultery if she continues to have sex with him; (because he is married to another now in the eyes of the Lord according to 1 Corinthians 6:16), and - if that husband continues to have sex with his lawful wife - he also commits adultery because he is now married to another by reason of 1 Corinthians 6:16.”
I must confess, I have never seen this verse taught that way. Most preachers just quickly read it and determine that somehow – Jesus was saying, “when a man divorces his wife- except for fornication – then it causes her to become an adulterer…and anyone who marries her becomes and adulterer.”
I believe that is far from the truth and the intention that Jesus was making. These preachers make assumptions about the scenario. First, how does a man who divorces his wife cause his wife to become an adulterer? She didn’t commit fornication with another man. Or, was it assumed that she did, and that Jesus is saying..”If a man divorces his wife because SHE had sex with another man, then she is an adulterer..and, in that case, anyone who marries her is also an adulterer.” That is true..but everyone knows that statement would be true!
Did Jesus mean to say that “nobody can hand their spouse a Writ of Divorcement UNLESS one of them commits adultery? And, if one spouse does commit adultery, then it is perfectly legitimate and lawful in God’s eyes that divorce – in case of adultery – is quite alright?”
“But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife except for sexual unfaithfulness forces her to commit adultery. And whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery”
How does sexual unfaithfulness on the part of one spouse then make it legal in God’s eyes for the spouse who did not commit adultery to go out and get married to someone else – who, in all likelihood…is not a virgin or was married once?
No, these preachers and teachers missed the part in between Matthew 5:27 and 33, so let me get you the intent of what Jesus was warning us about….I will read all of it, and highlight what everyone skips over!
Law of adultery Matthew 5:27-28 - “You have heard that it was said, Don’t commit adultery. But I say to you that every man who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery in his heart.”
Jesus tells us – “If you thought it – you did it – you are already guilty of the sin of adultery.” Like any other sin….they are ALL punished by a justice system of fairness. Jesus pointed out that nobody can obey the Law (the Ten Commandments) and his half-brother James wrote this in James 2:10 – “For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all.”
So ALL are guilty of breaking the Law…all have sinned and come short of the Glory of the Lord, God….and, the punishment for that Law breaking is death. “The wages of sin is death (in hell) but the GIFT OF GOD is eternal life in heaven – through His Son, Jesus Christ.” - Romans 6:23
Jesus went on to make this statement right after calling anyone who lusts after another an ADULTERER in his or her heart, “And if your right eye causes you to fall into sin, tear it out and throw it away. It’s better that you lose a part of your body than that your whole body be thrown into hell. 30 And if your right hand causes you to fall into sin, chop it off and throw it away. It’s better that you lose a part of your body than that your whole body go into hell.”
Jesus was WARNING us all that we are better off NOT getting ourselves into a sinful state by dwelling on sin, and when we do (and ALL OF US ARE GUILTY OF SINS COMMITTED), so He warned us all that we are better off avoiding hell, and the only way we can possibly do that is by accepting Him as our Savior. He is the only one who can forgive sins because HE PAID FOR THEM ON THE CROSS. Then Jesus continued….with the Law of divorce - Matthew 5:31-32- “It was said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife must give her a divorce certificate. But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife except for sexual unfaithfulness forces her to commit adultery. And whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.”
Paul, the apostle of the Lord, came after Jesus made the remarks in Matthew 5:27-33 concerning adultery (whether in the heart or in actuality), so I believe that Paul wanted to clarify what Jesus said. Jesus, after all, used his writers of the New Testament to deliver words of wisdom to the Jew and to the Gentiles - ongoing. Clarification was given by Paul in 1 Corinthians 6:16.
Now, in light of what Jesus said, and what Paul told us that Jesus passed on to him through divine means, let’s go read the verse the way it is supposed to read….
Matthew 5: 32 - in PLAIN ENGLISH - "But I say unto you, that whosoever shall break the holy bond of marriage to his lawful wife - because of fornication and adultery committed by him, that same man causes his wife to commit adultery if she continues to have sex with him; (because he is married to another now in the eyes of the Lord according to 1 Corinthians 6:16), and - if that husband continues to have sex with his lawful wife - he also commits adultery because he is now married to another by reason of 1 Corinthians 6:16.
So, even if you decide to remarry, you are still an ADULTERER forever, but God has reconciled you to Himself through Christ. If you remarry, you must give your "wife" who you chose to break the bond with (put away)..a legal "Writ of Divorcement" and both are free to marry whomever they wish.
It would be very WISE to seek God's blessing out going forward and commit to never remarry through fornication again (under 1 Corinthians 6:16) with another who is not your lawful spouse. To do so may cause you to see God long before He and you planned to!
John Tyler, Author or seven books.
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