“If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector.” (Matthew 18:17 N.I.V)
God forgives only those who repent of their sins. He does not expect us to accept being downtrodden, abused and taken for granted. This is what would happen if we forgive those who sin against us without them being repentant. Bad behavior must be challenged and confronted. “If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector.” (Matthew 18:15-17)
Even though you must show Christian love to everybody, you must set relationship boundaries with those who want to repetitively act without impunity towards you .You must not let them soil you and make your life weary and bitter. Forgive them from a distance without laying yourself up for fresh wounds.
*****
It is impossible for a man to be freed from the habit of sin before he hates it, just as it is impossible to receive forgiveness before confessing his trespasses... –Ignatius
*****
Read more articles by Wangari Murathe or search for articles on the same topic or others.
We must be careful NOT to create a "stumbling block" for others. We forgive others to be forgive by God: "Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us," Jesus told us in the "Model prayer."
We're also admonished to: "pray for those who dispitefully use you.."
No, we don't set ourselves up to be used and abused, but we "let our light shilne before men that they know whose we are."
Psalm 37 is a great resource in how to deal with people who'd take advantage of us.
God loves repententance, and "is married to the backslider. As we judge (those of the faith and not the world) so too will we be judged. Unforgiveness is the bigger infraction with God.
Besides, "the battle is not ours, its the Lords."
The best thing to do for those who take advantage or try is to pray for them--for truly they know not what they do.
I believe that's what you're trying to say. Be encouraged, God is not through with us yet as long as we have breath to repent. He knows His sheep and we all come to him at His not our "set-time."