I once felt like a princess; there was a time I felt pure
But then came the abuse, then rape, and now I am unsure
What changed? Was it my looks? My weight?
My breast? My shape?
People said it’s a part of life; I was turning into a beautiful young girl
With the confusion came lies
Then secrets that changed my whole world
On a mission to find something that can’t be replaced
For a moment of nonexistence; as reality gets unbearable to face
What is love? Better yet, how would I know?
When it’s taken instead of given, how are you expected to grow?
No longer “Babygirl”, my attitude and actions become wild
So I begin searching for love in older men, hoping they would recognize my inner child
I searched in night clubs, one night stands, and promiscuous acts of lust
A quick fix for imperfect love—no respect, no connection, no trust
I looked inside cigarettes, all kinds of drugs, and drink
A junkie for love; I began to question my sexuality regardless of what others think
Loneliness, brokenhearted, years of pain
Bound by depression, suicidal thoughts, feeling insane
Right when I thought it was over and my life would end
Jesus showed up and my testimony begins
See, I searched here, there, and everywhere, for something solid, that wouldn’t fall apart
Not understanding the greatest love was buried deep inside my heart
He raised me up, dried my eyes and brushed the dirt from my knee
He said “MY CHILD, ALL YOU ARE LOOKING FOR IS IN ME”
I’LL GIVE YOU LOVE, RENEW YOU TRUST, I’LL HOLD YOU IN MY ARMS
I’LL REDEEM YOU, HEAL YOU, AND PROTECT YOU FROM WORLD HARMS
OH, I WAS THERE ALL THE TIME; THOUGH SOME GIANTS YOU HAD TO FACE
ALL TO SERVE MY PURPOSE AND TELL OTHERS OF MY SAVING GRACE
So I’ve learned we must first love Him and the rest will fall in place
For as we learn to love ourselves and others we no longer search in the wrong place!
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