My family is moving from New York to Colorado in a couple of months. The idea came to us, not of our own devising, but from God. Through a series of visions and impressions, we have been led to relocate 2000 miles away to a small city in the Rocky Mountains. We have done this despite some uncertainty.
One uncertainty we face concerns income. I don't have a job out there, yet. My wife shall not work out there, which means right now we don't have any means of sustaining our lives out there aside from the equity we will receive from the sale of our home in New York. The lack of a job creates a problem in that we can't close on the house we intend to purchase in Colorado until I have proof of income; the bank won't give us the loan unless they're sure we can pay it back. That means I need to secure a job in the next month or so.
I learned about this predicament nearly two weeks ago. At the time, I had become anxious about the whole relocation process. We had put our place in New York up for sale 6 weeks prior and weren't receiving many offers on it. That week we had received an offer, but not in the ballpark we deemed fair so we turned it down. Interest rates were rising and we faced some uncertainty about closing on the house in Colorado in time. I thought we might have to move out to Colorado without a job and without the money from the sale of our home in New York. Both Laura and I had handed in letters of resignation. In September, neither of us would have jobs.
Things looked bad, and THEN I heard the news about the mortgage. On top of everything, we couldn't get a mortgage without a job in Colorado. I had sent in some job applications, but hadn't heard a word from anyone yet. Perhaps, I thought, another bank might give me a loan without proof of employment. When I called up another bank, though, I found out that would not be possible. No job in Colorado, no sale of the home, no job in New York, and no savings to fall back on. The streets (or my in-laws house) beckoned, it seemed.
Oddly, however, when I heard from the other bank, a sense of peace descended on me. Uncertainty's a good thing. If I had certainty, why would I need faith? God told us to go to Colorado, and if that's the case, He shall provide what we need to go there. All I could do was my best to make that happen. God will handle the rest. To borrow a metaphor from a book I read recently, when you step off a cliff, you learn very quickly to love the one who catches you. I had to believe, and did believe when it came down to it, that God would catch me.
You see, up until that point, I had attempted to handle the move under my own power, or thought I could. The process created quite a bit of anxiety, but I had to do what was necessary to obey God's word to move to Colorado. God could have eased my anxiety, I suppose, by giving me a job quickly or selling our place rapidly. Then again, that might not have eased my anxiety at all, but I would have found other reasons to be anxious.
God knew what I needed: to trust in Him. So, he led me to the lip of the cliff. My choice at that point was either to step off or to turn around or try to find some other way to get where I was going. I stepped off by committing myself to continuing in the direction I was headed. I could only do my best and trust God to handle the rest.
Incidentally, God has caught me. A week ago, we received a good offer on our place and will sign a sales contract this week. I also have a job interview a week and a half from now in Colorado. That doesn't mean I have a job yet, but God will provide.
Interestingly, neither I nor my wife chose to jump off a cliff. We chose to move without certain guarantees, but still hoped to move in the most secure way possible. God led us to the cliff, though, somewhat against our will; we didn't want to step off a cliff. Perhaps, though, that's the way it should be, for then I can't claim to great boldness or assurance of faith by saying 'Look at these cliffs I'm jumping off by faith in God.' Rather, God took me to the cliff and I simply chose to continue in the path he led, and then not without some trepidation. So, I cannot boast in myself or my faith, but in God alone who shows such patience, grace, and mercy to me, a sinner.
This was a beautiful
testimony of faith, and
God is still in the business of answering of
those who put it to action, for it's not what we see but what we believe, and if he did
the first, he will do the
last. Love it!